Page 46 of Without Pride and Prejudice

“Only that she puzzles them.” I could relate. She’d been puzzling me for years. “They can’t find anything wrong with her.Her brain activity appears normal, and she’s breathing on her own. There’s no swelling in her brain as far as they can tell, no broken bones, nothing other than her EEG waves showing that she’s dreaming. Yet she won’t wake up. It’s not a good sign,” I stammered, not wishing to admit it.

Kingston set the bag of food and the garment bag on the small couch in the room before pulling up a chair next to me.

I appreciated his calm presence more than he would know—he had a quiet confidence about him. Monroe called him a super babe. She said he reminded her of Gerard Butler in his prime, whatever that meant. I’d probably rolled my eyes when she’d mentioned it, but if truth be told, I found how she saw others endearing. Even if I admit to being a tad jealous she thought my estate manager was attractive.

“Don’t give up on her, sir.”

“I’m not. I can’t. Especially after ...” I was ashamed to admit to Kingston what I had said to her the night before.

“What is it? What happened?” Kingston was more than concerned.

“I hurt her. I told her she was too unconventional, and like a prat ... I ... I mentioned things she might want to think about changing for our image.”

Kingston’s face fell slack.

“It’s not the worst part. She thinks I kept myself from a relationship with her because I was embarrassed by her, that I don’t believe in her.”

“Is that true?” Kingston didn’t mince words.

“Of course not. Maybe ...,” I half conceded, wishing for it not to be true. “I was trying to protect her.”

“Pardon me for saying this, sir, but Miss Monroe doesn’t need your protection. She only needs your acceptance.”

Kingston was right, and his words packed a punch. I fell back in my chair, still gripping Monroe’s hand. “I don’t want thereto be any more articles in theDaily Mailabout her,” I lamely defended myself.

“You are the Duke of Blackthorne, sir. If you accept her, that holds more weight than some silly rag. And I don’t think Miss Monroe would care who did or didn’t accept her, as long as you did.”

I swallowed hard, feeling as if I’d just received a scolding—a much-deserved one. “She said as much.” I stared at the sleeping beauty, not stirring at all. “What if she never wakes up and I can’t tell her how sorry I am? How much I love her?”

Kingston offered me a small smile. “She’ll wake up for that. I think she’s been waiting years to hear that, and she wouldn’t miss it.”

I raised a brow. “You think she’s been waiting for me?”

Kingston shook his head as if to say I was dense. “I’ve known you both for seven years now.” Kingston had worked for my father before I inherited the title. “It’s been clear to me every time you bring Miss Monroe home that there was something special between the two of you. Relationships like yours don’t come along every day, sir. To be so comfortable around another person is a rare gift. But I could tell she tempered her feelings for you, and for good reason.” There he went again, sounding cross with me. “Your family is ... well ...” He thought the better of whatever he’d been going to say and instead murmured, “They’re different from Monroe.”

“You mean she’s love and sunshine and we’re proud berks?”

Kingston cleared his throat. “Those are your words, sir, not mine.”

I scrubbed a hand over my face, knowing he’d say the same and possibly worse about my family, and he’d be right. “My pride has cost me most dearly,” I admitted. “All the years I’ve wasted,” I lamented. “And now she ...” I couldn’t say the words.

“She’ll come through. You’ll see.” Kingston was more optimistic than me. “She’s probably having a very pleasant dream about helping someone.”

I chuckled as I imagined her running around with ten bonnets on her head, helping whomever she could to her heart’s content. “I wish I had told her how much she’s helped me throughout the years we’ve known one another instead of being a prick and telling her it would help our image if she didn’t try to rescue everyone she came across.” Why couldn’t I have just said,“You’re the first person I wake up thinking about and the last person on my mind before I fall asleep. Yours was the voice I needed to hear and the hand I needed to hold when I lost my father and had to take on this damn title. No one makes me smile like you or helps me to see the good in the world like you do.”

Kingston’s brow crinkled in a disapproving manner. “Perhaps, in that case, she hasn’t yet woken up because she’s trying to process living life without you. That can’t be an easy prospect for her. Sometimes we need our dreams in order to sort through things.”

I think I would rather have had Kingston slug me—his words landed a much harder punch than any fist. “Do you think I can bear the thought of being without her? I love her. I’ve always loved her,” my voice hitched unnaturally.

“I apologize, Your Grace. I’ve overstepped my bounds. There is no question in my mind that you love her. It’s been evident to me for years. Miss Monroe is an exceptional woman, and I think she helps people far more than she realizes.” He sounded as if he were speaking from personal experience, but he didn’t elaborate.

It made me wonder what he and Monroe talked about during their weekly calls. Did they discuss my sister? Was Kingston in love with Anna? I didn’t ask, not sure Kingston or Anna wouldwish me to pry. My only response was, “Monroe is the best person I know.”

Kingston nodded. “I apologize if I upset you. It wasn’t my intention.”

“I deserve your censure.”

“You did say I could speak my mind.” He grinned.

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