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“Nothing. Never mind.”

“Say it.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Since we fucked?” His grip tightens on the wheel. “Is that what you were going to say?”

I flinch at his crudeness, blinking back the sting of tears. My chest aches, and I don’t know why. This feels wrong.

“Forget it. Forget I said anything. I drank too mu—”

“Answer me.” His voice brooks no argument.

Can’t I disappear into thin air right now?

“Yes. Since we slept together,” I say.

“And do you want to fuck other men?” His knuckles turn white grasping the wheel harder.

“No, of course not.” The word bursts out of me in a soft cry.

“Good. You’re mine. And I don’t share.”

“So, do I have to share?”

The muscles in his jaw clench and unclench as he grits his teeth. “No. You don’t have to share me.”

Sophie was lying. That’s good to know, but…

“But you didn’t deny that there were… that you’ve been with other women from the office?”

“I didn’t say that either.” His eyes flick to me briefly. “Don’t put words in my mouth, Blue.”

I bristle at the nickname. “Well, what are you saying, then? What is this, Connor? Friends with benefits? A fling? Just sex?”

“It’s not just sex!”

“But it’s not a relationship either? Is it? Hiding in supply closets? Is that your definition of a healthy relationship? Am I a convenient distraction for you?”

“You are not, and will never be, just a distraction to me. Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

The car slows to a stop.

I stare at the chipped nail polish and faint calluses on my hands in my lap. “What are we doing?”

“I don’t know.” He stares straight ahead. “I don’t know what we’re doing or where this is going. But I know I don’t want anyone else touching you, and I won’t touch anyone else. I know I think about you all the damn time. And I know being with you feels right. Even when it’s complicated. Even when it’s messy.” He turns to me then, eyes pleading. “Isn’t that enough for now?”

How can it be enough when I don’t even know what this is?

“Blue? You still with me?”

I nod, not quite ready to face him. If I do, I might crumble.

“Talk to me.” His tone is gentle but firm. “I can see the wheels turning in that pretty head of yours.”

I let out a shaky laugh.

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