Page 321 of Kingdom of Ash

“You’re the one who’s about to die. I’d say you get to have a voice in it.”

She bared her teeth. “This is myfate. Elena tried to get me out of it. And look where it landed her—with a cabal of vengeful gods swearing to end her eternal soul. When the Lock is forged, when I close the gate, I will be destroying another life alongside my own.”

“Elena has had a thousand years of existence, either living or as a spirit. Forgive me if I don’t give a shit that her time has now come to an end, when you only received twenty years.”

“I got to twenty years because of her.”

Not even twenty. Her birthday was still months away. In a spring she would not see.

Rowan began pacing, his stalking steps eating up the carpet. “This mess is because of her, too. Why should you bear its weight alone?”

“Because it was always mine to begin with.”

“Bullshit. It could have as easily been Dorian. He’s willing to do it.”

Aelin blinked. “Elena and Nehemia said Dorian wasn’t ready.”

“Dorian walked into and out of Morath, went toe to toe with Maeve, and brought the whole damn place crashing down. I’d say he’s as ready as you are.”

“I won’t allow him to sacrifice himself in my stead.”

“Why?”

“Because he is myfriend.Because I won’t be able tolivewith myself if I let him go.”

“He said he would do it, Aelin.”

“He doesn’t know what he wants. He’s barely emerging from the horrors he endured.”

“And you aren’t?” Rowan challenged, wholly unfazed. “He’s a grown man. He can make his own choices—wecan make choices without you lording over them.”

She bared her teeth. “It’s been decided.”

He crossed his arms. “Then you and I will do it. Together.”

Her heart stopped in her chest.

He went on, “You are not forging the Lock alone.”

“No.” Her hands began shaking. “That is not an option.”

“According to whom?”

“According tome.” She couldn’t breathe around the thought—of him being erased from existence. “If it was possible, Elena would have told me. Someone with my bloodlinehasto pay.”

He opened his mouth, but beheld the truth in her face, her words. He shook his head. “I promised you we’d find a way to pay this debt—together.”

Aelin surveyed the scattered books. Nothing—the books, that scrapof hope they’d offered had amounted tonothing. “There isn’t an alternative.” She dragged her hands through her hair. “Idon’t have an alternative,” she amended. No card up her sleeve, no grand reveal. Not for this.

“We don’t do it tomorrow, then,” he pushed. “We wait. Tell the others we want to reach Orynth first. Maybe the Royal Library has some texts—”

“What is the point in a vote if we ignore its outcome?They decided, Rowan. Tomorrow, it will be over.”

The words rang hollow and sickly within her.

“Let me find another way.” His voice broke, but his pacing didn’t falter. “Iwillfind another way, Aelin—”

“There is no other way. Don’t you understand? All of this,” she hissed, arms splaying. “All ofthishas been to keep you alive.Allof you.”

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