Page 65 of Keeping Kaitlyn

I’m suddenly sure the only reason she’s strongarming me into meeting her and the rest of my former co-workers for a drink is because it’s New Year’s Eve and she knows that the only chance any of them have of getting through the door is with me leading the charge.

Me: I can’t promise anything. Just because I work for them doesn’t mean they’ll give me special treatment.

Jill: We’re willing to risk it.

I bet.

Me: Meet me in the parking lot in an hour.

Sighing, I set my phone down and look at Mookie. “Sorry, bud—change of plans. What do you think about taking your popcorn and going to hang out with Molly for?—”

My traitor of a dog is off the couch and parked in front of the door before I can even finish my sentence.

THIRTY MINUTES LATER,I’M CHANGED OUT OF MY PJs and standing in front of Ryan and Grace’s front door with a bowl of popcorn and an impatient Pitbull dancing around my feet. When he hears someone on the other side of the door palm its knob, Mook sits down and pretends to be a distinguished gentleman.

“You’re not fooling anyone,” I tell him with an eyeroll. “You know that, right?”

My dog sees my eyeroll and raises me a whine, his attention snapping back to the door when it’s finally opened. Seeing Ryan standing in the doorway, Mook tilts his head, hoping to see past him and into the apartment.

“Already finished it, huh?” Ryan says with a smirk, referring to the box of wine I hide in his fridge because as an employee of the veteran center we both live in, I’m technically not allowed to keep alcohol in my apartment.

“I wish.” Thinking of the full glass of Reisling sitting on my coffee table, I shake my head. “I’m being dragged out, against my will,” I tell him. “A few friends want to meet up at Gilroy’s for a drink. Mind if Mook hangs out with you guys for about an hour?” He’s good on his own for about forty-five minutes before he starts eating my socks and howling in protest.

“Gilroy’s?” Ryan laughs while he shakes his head. “Good luck with that.” Sighing, he looks down at the dog waiting at my feet. “It’s a madhouse down there—Cap’n just called Grace and offered her a grand, plus all his tips, to come in, which means it’s just me and Moll for the night.” When Ryan says her name, Mookie lets out a pitiful whine and lifts his paw like he’s Oliver Twist, begging for more. Before Ryan can torture him anymore, the door is pulled open completely and Grace is standing beside him.

“Of course, Mookie can hang out with Molly.” As soon as she says it, he lets out a happy bark and barrels his way through the doorway. A few seconds later, he’s greeted by a happy, high-pitched squeal. “I’m headed that way,” Grace says with a nervous smile. “We can walk together if you want.” Nervous because it’s been a few months since I chewed her out for trying to leave Ryan while he wasn’t home and even though she made the right decision and came back in the end, and hasn’t left since, we haven’t talked about it. Matter of fact, we haven’t really talked at all.

“Sure.” Nodding my head, even though I know I’m going to have to apologize for the way I spoke to her that day.

“Great.” Her smile brightens for a moment, before she reaches over to pull her coat from its hook while I offer Ryan the bowl of popcorn I brought over as tribute.

“For the cause,” I tell him with a laugh before taking a step back, giving Grace room to step into the hall so we can leave.

“I love you,” she says, leaning in to give Ryan a light kiss on the mouth that has me averting my gaze. “And I’ll be careful.”

“I love you too.” Ryan kisses her back. “Tell Ritchie Rich I said to walk you home after close.”

Grace rolls her eyes. “Like he’s my personal guard.”

“Exactlylike that.” Looking at me, Ryan gives me a flat smile. “Text me when you’re on your way home so I can watch for you.” Before I can tell him it’s not necessary, Ryan says, “yes, it is.” And shuts the door in my face.

“I’M SORRY.”

We’re halfway to Gilroy’s before I finally break the awkward silence between us. When I say it, Grace shoots me a puzzled look from her half of the sidewalk. We’re not alone. People are traveling in clumps. Girls huddled together against the cold inminiskirts and glittery New Years Eve tiaras. Guys in jeans and plastic top hats.

“For what?” She sounds genuinely confused. Like she has no idea what I’m talking about.

“You know…” When all she does is shake her head, still obviously confused, I sigh. “For the way I snapped at you, the day you came over to give me your key to Ryan’s apartment.”The day you packed up and left him.I don’t say it but she knows which day I’m talking about. “I shouldn’t have reacted so harshly. I just?—”

“Care about him and got angry with me for leaving him without an explanation,” she finishes for me with a gentle smile. “I get it. It’s okay.”

“I had a brother.” I blurt it out in a rush before my brain has a chance to catch up with my mouth. “He was in the Army. He died when I was seventeen.” I understand the implications of what I’m saying.HowI’m saying it. I’m making it sound like Luke died during active duty. Not at home. That it’s someone else’s fault that he’s dead—not mine. “Ryan... he—” Shaking my head, I look away from her while I struggle to get the words out without choking on them. “I don’t have a family and even though he drives me crazy and makes my job a million times harder than it has to be most of the time, Ryan is the closest thing I have and I just?—”

Before I can finish, Grace stops me on the sidewalk, forcing the cluster of sorority sisters on the sidewalk behind us to veer around us like a herd of drunk baby deer. Hand clutched around my arm, Grace ignores the dirty looks we get for creating a traffic jam and focuses on me. “You’re kidding, right?” For a second, I think she means about Luke dying but before I can shake my head, she keeps talking. “Youhavea family, Kaitlyn,” she tells me, the grip she has on my arm tightening slightly. “We’reyour family. Not just Ryan and Molly and me—all of us.” She mustbe reading the stunned look on my face perfectly because she laughs before letting go of my arm. “There’s no matching jackets or secret handshakes but trust me—you’re in.” Looping her arm through mine, Grace starts to pull me down the sidewalk again. “You think they’d trust you with Ryan’s care if you weren’t?”

I never really thought about it before. I figured Henley offered me the job as her brother’s private nurse as a sort of a consolation prize for the fact that she single-handedly ended whatever weird dynamic Conner and I had going between us, simply by existing. Or maybe she’s offered me the job because I’m the only nurse at Sojourn who wasn’t completely terrified of him. Either way, I never considered the fact that she might’ve offered me the job because she actually likes me.

Instead of saying any of that out loud, I give her a stubborn headshake. “Family or not, it wasn’t my place to say anything.”

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