A week later
"I don't know if I understood you correctly," I say, when in fact I did, and very well. So well that I feel sick.
"I'm very old, Miss, and thinking about what's best for you. That's why I'm looking for someone else to take my place."
"Is it better for me if you are no longer my guardian?" I ask, trying not to show how sad the news makes me.
Even though he never acted anything but professionally towards me, I hate change.
I live my life guided by rules.
How much to eat to avoid gaining weight. How many hours for sufficient sleep in order to be able to train better. And I have always completed my studies with almost the same dedication as I do when it comes to dancing.
Losing my parents at a young age made me insecure. I created a world of my own, where everything works perfectly as long as I follow the rules.
And now, he's telling me about the possibility, not of just any change, but rather, that perhaps soon I'll have to obey a total stranger.
"I don't understand why this is necessary."
"A new guardian? It is a testamentary requirement from your parents. You know that perfectly well. He will protect your rights and assets until you are old enough to enjoy them. Believe me, it's the best solution for you, Miss Blanchet."
Serenity
CHAPTER FIVE
NEW ORLEANS
I undothe bun that JeAnne insisted on combing my hair into when I left the house to come to my ballet practice and create another one, pulling it tighter.
She still treats me like a child sometimes. I have few good memories from my childhood, but the ones I have are with her around me, always vigilant and careful.
Every time I came back to the US during vacation from German school, she would be waiting for me with my favorite foods. Boarding school was scary for me. I was taken away from home when I was very young and forced to live with strangers. Suddenly, I lost the home I knew, my entire family, and was sent away from my beloved nanny.
I shake my head sadly, thinking about how unhappy I feel that my memory belongs to moments with JeAnne and not my parents. I don't allow myself to be melancholy for too long, though. At the start of practice, I need to be fully focused.
I look in the bathroom mirror at the dance school and notice that my hair is now exactly how I like it—so straight that it makes my eyes stand out at the corners, even though they’re usually big compared to the rest of my face.
Perfection is my goal in life, in any area. I am demanding of myself, and I like order. I don't feel happy with surprises or uncertainty, and that's why these last few weeks I've felt like the ground has disappeared from beneath my feet.
I’ve dreamed about this moment my whole life! While growing up in boarding school, I imagined when I would finally turn eighteen and be able to take care of myself, investing in my career as a dancer.
The first disappointment came with my guardian’s visit as soon as I returned to the United States. That was when I learned that my parents had left very clear stipulations in their will. There would only be two ways in which I could access my inheritance: at age twenty-one, provided I was married, or at age twenty-five if I remained single. Practically, this prevents me from growing up and being independent.
I am an adult, however, an adult who is believed to need supervision.
I was devastated. Thank God I have JeAnne by my side, since Mr. Van Lith, despite never letting me lack for anything, has never been more than a stranger to me, an employee of my parents who only kept in touch with me out of duty.
I'm not the malleable type, not one who adapts easily. I am rigid like a marble surface and tense like a stretched guitar string.
Discipline is my true north.
I had a hard time getting used to the news, but I tried to adapt to the reality that I couldn't be free. With my nanny and only friend by my side, I took a deep breath and was sure I could do this.
It was then that Mr. Van Lith dropped the bomb: the certainty, no longer the possibility, that I will have a new guardian. I’d still had hope that he would go back on his decision to transfer my guardianship to someone else.
Only yesterday, when I went to his office for the second time in a few days, responding to a call, did I discover the reason.
Apparently, my father owned a one percent share in a bank in which the man who will be my new guardian, Mr. Ares Kostanidis, is interested. Mr. Van Lith didn't say it outright, but from my point of view, he is blackmailing Mr. Kostanidis, saying that he will only sell this one percent if the man, whom I discovered is a Greek businessman, takes over my guardianship.