Page 64 of The Kraken's Queen

Allarick looks at me. “I need to help them?—”

“Go. I’ll be okay,” I say after seeing his hesitation. I want to hug him. To kiss him and make him see that I’m fine. But I’d have to stop playing, so I stay where I’m at, plucking the strings of my harp.

“I’m sorry, Erin.” The distress in his voice hurts, but when I look up, Allarick is already gone. I can't tell him he has nothing to apologize for.

I’m not sure how long I stay here, playing any song that comes to my mind. It reminds me of my recital days, when I would play for an hour in front of a large crowd. None of those recitals ever held such high stakes before.

The tension in the room is palpable. Whatever comfort my music brings people is fragile, threatening to break at any time. Mothers grab their children. Lovers reach out for each other. Families crowd together. The guards attempt to keep the crowd calm as they direct them safely out of the castle.

Slowly, the packed room empties until I’m playing for an audience of one. The last guard remaining has something stuffed in his ears. He should be safe from thesiren’s call, but I don’t want to risk it until Allarick comes back.

It takes another ten minutes before my husband returns with Delmare at his heels. Iris is no longer with him, so I can only assume my maid left with the others. Good. She needed to be where she’s safe. She’s also a calming presence, so I hope she can bring comfort to a family in need.

“You can stop playing, Erin. The song has stopped,” Allarick says. Notsweet girl.Erin.

It concerns me that the Leviathan’s song stopped, but I allow my hands to fall like dead weights down to my side. The reprieve I feel is instant, giving my sore fingertips a break.

Only a few merpeople stay behind. In total, there are six men, all older and more experienced guards, plus Delmare and Allarick. This is the team he’s selected to go with him to the Leviathan prison.

I straighten up, giving my back a much-needed stretch after hours of playing. “Where are we going now?” I ask, though I really just want a nap. But time is of the essence, so my nap will have to wait.

None of the guards around Allarick meet my gaze after I ask my question. I try to catch Delmare but regret it. He’s looking at me the way someone looks at a child who has just been left out of a friend group: with pity and sadness.

Finally, my eyes land on Allarick. He’s staring right at me, as if trying to commit every part of me to memory.

Like he might not ever see me again.

Heat rushes to my face as a rising panic I’m desperatelytrying to keep in check forms. “Allarick?” I speak his name, though it’s soft and almost frightened.

Allarick swims over to me. When he’s right in front of me, his tentacles reach out and wrap around my body before pulling me flush against his chest. There’s pain in his expression, but pain for what? For whom? And why?

He silences my overactive brain with a kiss. It starts off innocently enough. Soft touch of our lips. But it quickly turns into something more. Hungry, maybe even desperate. He kisses me like a dying man on his last breath. He pries my mouth apart, and I open for him. His tongue claims my mouth in a rough but passionate way. I can’t help the small moan that leaves my lips.

I vaguely remember that we have an audience, but I don’t have it in me to feel embarrassed as Allarick kisses me until I’m breathless before him. He pulls away from me, and I whimper, not ready for him to stop.

Because something in me knows his next words will shatter me.

“I love you, Erin Goodwin. You made falling in love with you easy. Ender brought you to me because he knew I needed you. Needed your warmth, love, and tenacity.” Allarick’s voice wavers at the end.

He loves me.

Allarick loves me.

He said it once before, but it feels different now. Like it’s the most important thing in the world. To me, it is.

So why does this feel like a goodbye?

“Allarick, I?—”

He silences me with another kiss that steals mywords. I kiss him with the words I cannot say but feel so deeply. He needs to know. Hehasto know.

Once again, Allarick breaks off his kiss. I see the regret but acceptance in his eyes. “Our people need a ruler if things go bad. They need you, Erin.”

“No, they need us. Allarick, they needus,” I cry, but he doesn’t listen. “I need to go with you. I need to help you. Allarick, please!”

He can’t be doing this. He can’t possibly think of pushing me away now. Not when he made me love him. Not after he helped pick up all the broken shards of my heart and reconstruct the pieces even stronger than before.

But Allarick lets me go. He pushes me into Delmare’s arms. Before I can reach for Allarick again, Delmare catches me and pulls me away. “Take care of her, Delmare.”

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