Page 67 of The Kraken's Queen

Nori sighs, resigned to his unknown fate. “Then we best be off. And pray the sea goddess is on our side.”

I nod and follow Nori down the hall, leading to the front of the castle where our steeds await us. The other guards are already mounted, waiting for further instructions. The mood is pensive, though not completely hopeless. A sliver of hope pulses through our troop.

Good.

We need to hold on tight to that hope. The moment it flickers out of existence is the moment our cause is dead. The momentweare dead.

I approach the group and stare at the men still with me. This is the part where I should give them a speech of heroism and the importance of our victory. But everyone already knows what’s at stake. They know what happens if we fail.

So, instead I say the only thing that might breed purpose and inspiration.

“Remember who we are fighting for.” I leave my words vague for a reason. Everyone here is fighting for our people, but they have loved ones theywant to keep safe. It could be their mates. Their children. Their parents.

Sweet hazel-colored eyes come to mind. The melodic laughter. The softness of her skin against mine. I feel Erin with me. I keep her locked deep in my heart to give me the strength I need to battle our enemies.

Nori comes up beside me and dips his head. He grabs the reins of his hippocamp and commands the beast to go. I’m on his heels with the others flanking us.

My last thought before I leave my castle behind for who knows how long is Erin.

I’m coming back to you, sweet girl. Wait for me.

Chapter 39

Erin

As it turns out, pretending your heart isn’t broken into a million pieces requires a lot of energy. The day after arriving at Atina’s house, I wanted nothing more than to stay in bed all day. Unfortunately, Atina had different plans for me.

After a quick breakfast of eggs and ham—I ate only a few bites—Atina pulls me outside and into the sunlight. “You need to show your face to your people.” She takes me from cabin to cabin.

I put on a smile because what else can I do? Fear hangs heavy in the air, and I don’t want to add to it. Atina leads me back toward the ocean. We pass Delmare, Iris, and a few other royal guards who are helping pass out supplies and food to those who need it. Guilt gnaws at me. I should be out there helping them, not trailing Atina like a lost puppy. I can’t muster up more than a weak smile and a simple hello.

It’s draining.

I spend most of my day with Atina, moving mechanicallyand not speaking. Atina tries to elicit any emotion from me, but she comes up short each time. Eventually, she stops trying. I don’t blame her. I would give up on me too.

I see Allarick in everything I’m doing. I see him in the people who come up to me, telling me how strong I am. I don’t feel strong, though. Quite the opposite, really. I see Allarick each time Atina turns on me with her brows drawn together. She looks so much like her brother, it’s hard to be around her for too long.

But it’s just a ghost because my husband isn’t here. And I don’t know if he ever will be again.

I make no complaints when Atina finally grows weary of me and offers to take me back to her cabin. I go without protest. “Are you hungry? I can make dinner.” She’s already halfway to the kitchen, not interested in my answer.

I’m not hungry.

But I somehow doubt she’ll care.

After twenty minutes of her tinkering around in the kitchen, Atina sets a plate of salmon and rice in front of me. She takes a seat at the table and wastes no time inhaling her food.

“So,” she says between bites, “do you have a course of action yet?”

I play with the rice on my plate before taking a bite. I’m sure it’s a fine meal, but I don’t taste anything. “No.”

Atina sighs heavily, lowering her head. I don’t wait for her to tell me just how shitty of a queen I’m being, so I rise and grab my plate. “Thank you for dinner. I’m tired and think I’ll head to bed.”

Atina doesn’t even look at me as she nods. I hesitate, wanting to apologize but torn between her feelings and my own. Ultimately, my selfishness wins, and I walk to the kitchen and discard my plate. I make my way to the bedroom and shut the door. Atina insisted I take her bed last night—the same bed I slept in when I first arrived to Mescos—and I’m assuming that offer extends to tonight as well.

I don’t even change before I climb into bed and hold a pillow to my chest. My only reprieve from this heartache is to close my eyes and drift off to a dreamless, silent sleep.

I’m not sure how long I stay asleep that night, but when I wake up in the morning and finally force myself out of bed, Atina is gone. I don’t blame her after yesterday, but loneliness creeps in anyway. I’m sure she got tired of my mopey shit.