Page 7 of I See Red

“No, but that would be super cute for some average guy to do. Luckily, I’m not average, and my hands are walking icicles, and my beautiful and amazing girlfriend loves them the most. Sometimes, I think you love them more than me.”

Oh yeah, I’m with you for your hands, Tayden.

I belt out a laugh so sarcastic you’d think I’m irritated, but I’m not.

“Well, I mean, they are your best attribute.”God, my flirt game is on fire today;reel it back in.

“Hey, by the way, my birthday party is coming up, and I wanted to know if you could come? My mom said you could. Interested?” I can see the nerves building with his question.

“Wait, your mom said yes?” Uncertainty consumes my face, I try not to let him see, but he knows how hard of a topic his mother is for me. I really want her to like me, but I know that is not the case, in the slightest. She tries to hide it, and I appreciate it. I really do. I’m not sure if it’s my astrological curse, a trauma-fueled superpower, or possibly a little of both, but having the ability to read people before they can even read themselves is a blessing and a curse. She absolutely entertains Tayden and I for him. Not because I am the type of girl she sees for her son. Not by a long shot.

“I am shocked. You know she hates me.” My defenses begin to rise.

“She doesn’t hate you, Ives. You are just misunderstood by her, and it’s important to me, so after some begging, she agreed. I really want you to be there, so please come?”

He gushes, leaning back into the squeaky handmade wooden lockers, the urgency of my acceptance of his invitation blazing at me through his big brown eyes. He reaches for both of my hands as if he is pleading his case.

“Okay, I’ll come. I.M. me the deets tonight?

“Deal.”

“Let’s Go, Let’s Go, Let’s Go” comes roaring through the walls.

“Shit, Sensei is starting, and we aren’t in line.”

Tayden squeezes my hand, planting a kiss on my cheek, as many other karate couples do, too. I mean, we all basically live together here, after school until nine in the evening and damn near twelve hours in the summer. Who are we supposed to date if not each other?

“Leave your relationships outside the studio!” Sensei yells.

Yeah, like any of us have a life outside of here.

Falling in line, Sensei is already in his spot at the front corner by the mirrors with a hand on each end of his belt that hangs, his feet perfectly together, soldier-like.

“We have a competition to get ready for, can’t be winning trophies kissing each other.”

Ugh, he can be so embarrassing, like we haven’t noticed his new relationship.I mean, what does he expect? We’re all bound to date someone here. I bet marriages come out of this old studio years down the line. I certainly never thought I would be dating anyone here; however, I must say I scored the absolute best of the misfits.

The cold drifts away as we run to opposite studios, our ranks separating us. A part of me slips away each time his hands disconnect from mine. Yearning for him makes me sound crazy, but if being lucky enough to meet my soulmate this young and be fully aware of it intellectually makes me crazy, then I’ll not only wear the shoe, but I’ll lace it up.I mean, everyone else thinks I already do; little do they know.

Red VS. Tayden

“Looking back, I knew better; I owed her better, but I could argue she owed me better just the same. We have never had much grace for one another when it comes to him… Tayden. God dammit, Tayden.”—Red

Present Day

Logically, there are two ways this will go. One, we either end up finally fucking after all these years by the end of tonight, or two, we will be in the near future. Harsh, but the truth. Keeping our hands off each other all these years has been easy when our interactions have remained strictly through text and Facetime, but in physical form, I am unsure whether either of us possess the amount of restraint required. We are in uncharted waters here. Knowing Tayden, this is the exact reason he showed up to our event this evening. The only question is, who did he come for? Luckily for me, Ivy bitched out and left, so I am who hegets. I won’t lie; the history between us three is messy. Things have always been reactive between Ivy and I when it comes to him. She’s always wanted him in the shadows. I, on the other hand, have wanted him for myself in reality; to wake up to him, fall asleep with him every night, and build our lives together, but a promise is a promise, and I did make that promise to her all those years ago in that hotel room. So, for once in my life, I need to weigh out the pros and cons of the conversation I am about to have with him. Secondly, consider the repercussions at the end of it for everyone this triangle has always involved ensuring I maintain poise and class. Consideration has never been my strong suit, especially when I’ve had more than my share of cocktails tonight. My body relaxes as my imagination runs rampant with him in view. It’s the perfect recipe for bad decisions. Would I love to rip the clothes of this tall, tanned, white-smiled, impeccable Panamanian man right here at the table and to hell with anyone who sees? The man with whom I have a lengthy history and my heart beats for, and just wreck him physically? Absolutely. The things I would do to him would be sinful, corrupt, and immoral. For now, I need to just have a conversation and focus on keeping my dress off the floor by the end of the night, because I’m not the only history this man has, and Ivy isn’t all that is at stake.

Stay classy Red. Stay classy, do not let your vagina do the talking. Just conversation, nothing else.

My curiosity ablaze, I sit patiently awaiting his response. Just two old friends in a stare-off.

“Why, isn’t really the question here, or is it, Red?”

God, his passive-aggressive responses never cease to amaze me. It is so typical of him and partially our problem. He’s always throwing the ball in my court like he isn’t the key player. Listening to him speak reminds me of all his voice does to me; the warmth begins creeping up my legs with each roll of histongue, landing smack between my thighs. I can feel the throb, the torment between my body and my mind building already. The internal struggle of want versus need races through me, and I’m fearful but aware of which will prevail.

Jesus Christ Red, you are fucked.

“I mean, hasn’t it always been the question, Tayden? Why, why not?” I whimper, taunting him, sliding my hand up to my mouth, slowly sucking one of the two olives off the red crystal spear that holds them between my lips, my refusal to drop my gaze fueled by that of his own.

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