He didn’t say anything, just poured the coffee, his expression giving nothing away.
“Second, I wanted to explain a bit. I get that I’m twenty-six years old and...” Yup, just as fucking awkward as I thought this would be.
Mack finally looked up, his eyes meeting mine. “Little do—”
The way he cut himself off, because I’d already told him not to call me that, made my heart squeeze. “I want to start by saying that just because I’ve never had sex, that doesn’t mean I’m a virgin.”
His hazel eyes were clouded with confusion. “Okay.”
I took a bite of omelette, needing a moment to get my thoughts together. Setting my fork down, I blew out a breath. “It’s not like I don’t know what sex is, is what I mean.”
“Alright.”
“I’ve just never done it.”
“Got it.”
Fuuuuuck. You know what? It was time to lay it all on the table, in the hopes that I’d get laid myself. “Being sick for so much of my life hasn’t given me many chances to hook up, right?”
“Right.”
“On top of that, still living at home with Mom and Dad really cramps my style.”
“I see.”
Jesus, it was a good thing he was a better kisser than he was a talker. Toying with my fork, I kept my gaze lowered. It would be much easier to get through this next part if I wasn’t looking at his face. “But it’s beyond ridiculous now and I feel like the older I get, the more difficult it’ll be. I mean, everyone just assumes, right? Even the doctors, as part of my after care, suggested an IUD, since falling pregnant within a year of surgery could be dangerous. And you know what I did?”
“What?” His voice was low and rumbly, making me shiver.
“I said yes. Because it was easier to do that than tell them I’d never had sex.”
“Arabella...” The tone in his voice had me raising my eyes to his and what I saw had my insides turning to goo.
“Look, Mack. It’s as simple as this. I’d really like to, uh, not be a virgin by the time this trip is over.” The flash in his eyes had me rushing on. “I’m attracted to you and I don’t know about you, but that kiss this morning was pretty fucking hot. And if you’re not into me, that’s fine. I can deal with it.” Liar.
“It’s not that.”
I blinked. That was more than I’d expected. “Oh.”
“I’m not the guy for this.”
“Because of who I am?”
“No. Because of who I am.”
“Well, maybe you could give me a chance to make my own decision about that.”
He pushed to his feet, gathering up our plates and carrying them to the sink. “I’m not gonna do this with you, Arabella.”
Fuck, that stung. “Why not?”
“Because you don’t know what you’re asking.”
Jesus, he had no idea what it had taken for me to be so honest with him. “We’re both grownups, Mack. I’m not asking for a ring, for fuck’s sake.”
“Maybe not, but you’re asking for more than you should.”
“Sorry.”