Page 44 of Nova Academy

I wasn’t used to it, and I didn’t know what to do with it.

I also didn’t deserve it.

I kept trying to force down the irritation that arose every time they showed me they cared, and that was giving me something else to focus on. I adjusted that irritation to aim it at myself for even letting things get as far as they had. No one was supposed to noticed me enough to care, but I had failed myself and my mission by lowering my shield, even if only a tiny bit, it was still too much.

My emotions were becoming dangerously overwhelming, my self-depravation digging its claws into me deeply enough that it started to feel like the truth. And perhaps it was. I was a failure. I was going to get caught. I wasn’t ever going to be good enough, or skilled enough to save Libby.

I was worthless, useless, pathetic…

No. I couldn’t let those thoughts win. I doubled down on my efforts to push them aside and focus on what needed to be done. I would turn those negative concepts into self-fulfilling prophecies if I continued to listen to them. Instead, I brought up the coping techniques Libby and I had learned together to ground us in the present. Deep breaths, find three things I could see, three things I could hear, and three things I could touch. More deep breaths. Some positive affirmations. A couple more deep breaths…

When I came out of the fog of despair I realised I had been moving on autopilot and we had just entered a classroom.

The second class of the day was Strategy. Unlike the otherclasses or assignments, and despite how we were still grouped together in our teams, there was a separation in this class that I was pleased about. We sat at individual desks, large enough to contain multiple maps both in physical and holographic forms, and we were spread out enough that there would be no overlap or confusion.

We were also required to perform the tasks assigned to us as individuals rather than teams. The instructor informed us that there would be two assessments, one as an individual to determine our personal knowledge of the subject, and the second would be completed as a team. The latter would take the longest to complete, for we were going to have to take turns in each role.

Unfortunately for me, I had already downloaded all kinds of strategy information prior to my enrolment at Nova, so I wasn’t learning anything new today. I had already implemented and tested my covert strategies in real scenarios, my current mission included. So in all honesty, I had nothing to do except tune out the instructor and sit there, drowning in boredom and wishing to utilise that knowledge in my active operation.

Actually, I could do just that.

I had about three more turns until we were dismissed for the evening meal, and the instructor was spending the lesson lecturing. My participation was not a requirement for today. So, I decided to do something I usually only dared to do in the quiet of the night where no one could see.

I raised my hand, and the instructor called upon me. ‘Do you have a question?’

‘No, sir. I just need to use the restroom,’ I told him.

He pursed his lips in irritation but agreed to let me go. I rushed from the room, ignoring the curious looks from the other cadets as I left. It didn’t take long to reach the restrooms, and I was pleased that all the stalls appeared to be empty. I picked the one furthest away, ensured the door was locked behind me, and settled myselfon the toilet. It wasn’t comfortable, but it would do in a pinch.

Then I touched a single finger to the holo-tab attached to my belt and gave a mentalpush.

Though I could still see and interact with my surroundings, information began to flood my brain. Files of information branched into different pathways along a glowing web of interconnected data. I closed my eyes to ensure the telltale blue under-glow wouldn’t be so noticeable if anyone happened to enter the restrooms and glance between the cracks, then began skimming the different files, quickly dismissing anything that didn’t pertain to what I was searching for and skipping the branches through which I had already thoroughly searched.

When I had been doing that for quite some time and still getting nowhere, I decided to switch things up. I had avoided this for the sole reason that it used up a lot more energy than simply skimming and reading, and it would affect me until I could get some rest. I might even have to skip the evening meal in favour of going to bed early, but there wouldn’t be a better time to do this that now.

I had to take the opportunities as they presented themselves.

Three of the lines lit up brighter than the others, and I knew those were the branches to follow to get the information for which I was searching. How relevant that data was would have to be determined once I had access to itI picked one at random and drifted down the line. While some contained only one destination, others continued on with multiple. Those were the files within files within files, and typically meant I would need a password or something of the sort to access them. I could bypass the lock given enough time, but when I hit the first block I chose to move onto the next. I could go back tonight to break through any barriers.

The next line was the same, so I tried the third.

That one let me through without any resistance, and I gripped onto it eagerly, impatient to finally get somewhere in myinvestigation.

What I uncovered, however, was not what I had been expecting.

It was an audio recording that had been deleted but hadn’t been completely erased from the server. Audio files were more difficult to investigate in a public setting because I would have to focus more on the internal happenings than the external. If anyone tried to get my attention, short of physically shaking me they wouldn’t succeed.

But I decided to take that risk and let it play.

It was a conversation between a man and a woman recorded on board The Carina and date-stamped two days ago. Unfortunately, because there was no video footage, I was unable to determine their identities.

‘Any contenders?’ the woman asked the man.

‘There are a few cadets who fit the profile.’

‘What about the Christianson kid? He’s been actively searching for a way to keep his sister safe after the assault. Hasn’t left her side in the infirmary since.’

‘He’s top of the list. I had wondered about the Hastings kid, too.’

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