Page 53 of Rox

“Then, of course, your aunt Bri had to tell Ashlynn that she was coming out here, and we all know how Ash is. I guess she told Willie he better get them both here, or she was withholding sex and food,” Dad rolls his eyes, “so they’re coming too. Something about not letting everyone else have all the fun.”

It’s been so long since we’ve seen any of them. I’m a bit sad Mamaw El and Papa Ken can’t come with them. Mamaw hasn’t been feeling the best lately, and the long drive would have been too much for her.

Everyone is outside, ready to greet them all. I wish I could glance over at Max and give him a smile. We’re going to be fine.I know we are. This relationship thing isn’t easy, but great love never is. Or, at least, that’s some shit I’ve heard. But I know it’s possible. I see the men who just pulled up with their partners, and I know people can work through their issues.

Mom barrels past me and rips open the passenger door of the SUV that followed the bikes up to the house. I see her jump in, wrapping her friends in warm hugs. I know they’re still close, but the distance is hard.

I tear up because Mom is so happy. She finally lets the ladies out of the car, and they giggle and shriek while holding each other. Seriously, they’re talking at a pitch I’m sure only dogs can hear.

“What’s going on here? I haven’t heard this much hollering since my date last week.” Duck calls out as he rounds the house, giving Willie a high five as he passes.

“Hey, asshole, there are kids around. Watch what you say!” Ashlynn calls over to him, stepping away from Mom. While we all work incredibly hard to watch our mouths around the kids, these guys are bikers. Besides, there’s a lot worse in the world than the word fuck.

“Hey, shithead, you swore. I just made an innuendo, so why don’t you watch your mouth.” Duck retorts, feeling smooth; he shoots a grin at Willie, who just shakes his head and steps back.

“Hey fucker, no one calls me shithead but my best friends, and you don’t have that honor or privilege, so you watch your mouth.” Ashlynn starts to make her way toward him, and I laugh as all the brothers take a few steps back.

“Give it time, chick-ee. You and I will be the best of friends by the time all this is over.” Duck gives her a sly smile. They’re pretty much chest-to-chest this time.

“On this date, did they fuck you stupid?” Ashlynn asks.

“No, that’s just my natural charm.”

They continue to eye each other. Ashlynn squints her eyes, sizing him up. Duck smiles at her, trying to disarm her with charm. We just call it annoying. Everyone is still watching this whole thing, saying nothing, until Adam has enough and calls out to Willie about his new Lego set—officially breaking the tension.

“Hey, sweet girl,” Auntie Bri says to me softly. I had been so fixated on the battle of witlessness that I didn’t see her come up to me. I wrap my arms around her, and it immediately feels like the exact thing I need. “Your mama kinda filled me in on what’s been going on. Why don’t you and I go chat while Ashlynn is distracted,” she whispers in my ear.

I smile and pull back from the hug. My eyes start to well up a little as I nod and lead her upstairs to my childhood bedroom. Not much has changed here since I was seventeen. Still teal and white walls, pictures of growing up around here, and memories from our time in Colorado. We sit on the bed, and I cross my legs and face her, unsure where to start.

“So, your man also has the emotional maturity of a teaspoon?” Auntie Bri laughs while taking my hand.

“I wouldn’t go that far. It’s just when we go through something big and emotional. Even if it’s just on his side, he needs to walk away to find himself. The first time I understood, it was a heavy talk, but he still tried to be there if I needed him.” I take a deep breath, calming the waver that starts in my voice. “This time, though, it’s like a bomb blew, and I was left to clean up all the shrapnel on my own. I love him, but I don’t think I can forgive him this time. My heart says I should, but my head is battling it.”

“Hmm,” is all she says as she rubs her thumb along the back of my hand. “I think because our men went through it at such a young age, I am guessing, and you don’t have to confirm or deny anything, they can’t process anything without more hurt.To them or to others around them. The only way they see reason is with more or less a slap in the face once they hit that bottom.” I laugh and remember when Mama Judy told me about how she handled him.

“Well, I think a cold shower while sleeping was effective, but I see that,” I tell her with a sad smile.

“He came back to you and listened to what you had to say?” I nod, and she continues, “Then you were the one to walk away this time, and he needs to earn that trust back?” I nod again. “Good, make him sweat. He made you hurt, and it’s time for some payback. The only difference is that this time, the lines of communication are open. Healing can take place.” She explains to me.

“We did have a great talk and…other things before my mind won, and I needed some distance,” I explain.

“Fair, but are you still talking to him?”

“I let him know when I wake up and when I go to sleep.” I grab my phone off the bedside table. I see messages from Max telling me about his day, when a memory of me crosses his mind, or just for him to tell me he loves me.

“He is seeing things from your point of view now. Now you two can talk and heal. Communication is something that most people take for granted, but I think you two will figure it out.” She pats my leg and pulls me into another hug. “Is he coming to dinner tonight?”

“Yes, Mom asked him because he is still my boyfriend, and this is a family dinner. She is still very team Mimic, even when she’s pissed at him.” I laugh, sniffling as more emotions bubble up.

“Your mama wouldn’t bet on a losing horse. Let’s go downstairs and see what’s left of Duck and if your mom needsany help with dinner prep.” Auntie Bri stands up and holds her hand out for me to take.

* * *

The night goes by amazingly. Family members talk, laugh, and walk down memory lane. Everyone tells stories while we enjoy the campfire after dinner. Mom and the other ladies are in the house, putting my siblings to bed and restocking wine and beer for everyone.

Max attached himself to my side when he showed up and hadn’t left. We barely spoke, but during dinner, I took his hand under the table, and he relaxed a bit. I craved connection as much as he did.

“Hey, kids, wanna come for a walk with us? Show us around?” Whitley asks, standing and taking Knuckles’ hand in his.

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