Page 25 of Midnight Secrets

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Chapter Ten

Ash

I was fucked.

There was a reason I hadn’t kissed anyone in so long I could barely remember the last time. Emotions. They were pesky, nasty little fuckers that took over your mind and demanded you submit to their every whim.

The moment my lips touched Lucrezia’s, I knew that I’d crossed a line. I could fuck a hundred women and walk away without a backward glance, but her huge eyes watching me and the way her body fitted against mine made me break every rule I possessed and kiss her.

Now, I was sitting here staring out into the darkness of the Tuscan night with my mind in turmoil. If I went to her room with that box of stones, I would be tempted to do something that couldn’t be undone.

Like that kiss.

The sensation of her lips on mine still lingered, her floral scent intoxicating me, and the way her fingers moved into my hair made the hairs at the back of my neck rise in memory. Yeah, I was in trouble and it was the kind that a loaded gun couldn’t fix.

“You’re thinking too hard,” Xavier said from his lounger. He was a different person here, more relaxed and approachable.

I sighed. “Just contemplating Dad’s latest crimes against humanity.” He was an asshole I blamed on everything when I didn’t want to discuss what was really on my mind. “He has another mistress tucked away. I noticed the regular debits going out of his account and hope this one won’t turn up at the family home demanding money for another child he has spawned.”

Xavier lifted his glass to his lips and took a long sip. “He should do what Dad did and have a vasectomy. It would remove the need for all these paternity tests.”

“He should just get it cut off before it falls off,” I muttered as my mood descended further into darkness. The last mistress swore that the daughter was his and the little girl he’d always wanted. The paternity test revealed she’d been lying and she’d been entertaining gentlemen callers in the apartment Dad had been paying for.

Xavier laughed. “His taste in women is as bad as Dad’s. That’s why he ensured that there would be no paternity issues.”

Lucas groaned. “Hugh found the love of his life and Matteus stood before God and declared his fidelity. Death does not erode those vows.”

Twenty years after his wife died, and he was still in love with her. We could all aspire to that type of devotion. In all the times I’d spent with him he never even looked at another woman.

Xavier drained his glass and filled it again from the decanter on the ground beside him. He held it out to me and I shook my head because I needed to keep it clear. “Dad has been searching for what he had with Mum from the day she died.”

“My dad doesn’t have that excuse,” I said. Mum had created the social life he wanted, given him the heirs he demanded, and rarely complained at his horrendous behaviour. It was only when I took over as the family accountant that I had been able to help her and gave her some freedom away from his tyranny.

“True,” Xavier agreed. “But it also means that you’ll never treat a woman the way he does your mum.”

I didn’t need the responsibility for anyone else on my shoulders. I was carrying the weight of Mum and my brothers there already. When I became too big for him to defeat in the fighting ring, he turned his attention to my younger brothers. Michael was the only exception because he was as twisted as Dad. Both of them had the cruel genes of the family.

“Sometimes I think maybe I should stay single the rest of my life,” I replied.

“Nonsense!” Lucas almost shouted from where he sat puffing on his cigar. “Men like us are born with fire in our souls. When we find the woman that inflames that fire, we cannot resist them the same as those moths over there that are perishing in the flames.”

It sounded like a horrendous punishment the way he described love.

“You should really work on your description,” Xavier said. “You make love sound like our damnation.”

Lucas turned to face us. “My Isabella was my angel from the first moment I saw her. She walked into the room and I wondered how I had never seen her before. All other women evaporated from my view from that day, and she was the only one I saw.”

“Not everyone gets love at first sight,” Xavier said.

“I don’t care what the poets and artists say,” Lucas continued. “You know they are the right person because nothing else feels right. You sense it deep inside where all truths hide.” He tapped his chest.

The problem was that he described the moment Lucrezia walked into the restaurant. All the other women around me faded into insignificance. My dick wasn’t interested when I took him to the Midnight Rooms because he was sniffing around what he couldn’t have.

The clock inside in the hall chimed and I counted. Ten. All my plans of staying away and avoiding Lucrezia evaporated. I could no more stay away from her than those poor incinerated moths at the brazier could avoid the flames.

I left the others contemplating life and stepped inside. The box was still in the bottom of my bag. My finger traced along its edge as I stood staring out the patio windows of my room. Everything was more complicated than it needed to be. Normally, if someone interested me, I fucked her until she was out of my system and moved on. Lucrezia was different because I was emotionally invested before she interested me.

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