Page 29 of Midnight Secrets

“Stay,” I pleaded in a low voice. Nothing made sense anymore unless Ash was here.

His forehead pressed to mine. “If I stay, I’ll end up fucking you and then everything we have will be ruined. I’m poison, and everything around me gets destroyed.” The pain in his voice made my heart ache. This was a strong, powerful man who was in agony.

“Stay,” I repeated, my arms tightening around him to pull him into my embrace until I was wrapped around him like a koala bear. He resisted for a moment before his body sank into mine and I felt his lips brushing my shoulder.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” he whispered for only me to hear.

“Then don’t.” It was as simple and complicated as that.

“Lucrezia,” he groaned, trying to pull back but I wouldn’t let him. “It’s not my choice. Darkness surrounds me and takes everything I care about.”

I sighed and snuggled closer. “Papa always said that evil was not a thing, but a person. If they don’t know what you care about, then they can never take it from you.”

My pride already lay in tatters on the ground when it came to this man. He always appeared confident and in control. Maybe he was the same as the rest of us—afraid, lonely, and hurting.

“Don’t block me out, Ash. I don’t know what this is, but it belongs to just you and me. No one else needs to know.”

He sighed and used his strength to push himself up, even though I remained attached in my marsupial hug. He flopped onto his back and dragged the blanket over us. “Get some sleep, Lucrezia. Your father will probably kill me in the morning.”

It wasn’t a victory, but it wasn’t a rejection either.

I snuggled down beside Ash and closed my eyes. His strong arms held me, and for the first time in as long as I could remember, I felt safe. Having a guard with you wasn’t the same as lying beside someone you trusted, and that was the issue. I did trust Ash, completely. He made me feel empowered and able to take control of business. He listened to me and treated me as an equal.

Ash made me visualise a future that I didn’t have to play a role instead of living. He was the white knight I envisaged as a child, only this one rode a black Harley and was chased by demons. Dare I take a chance and risk my heart and my future on a man who resisted me? Were the sensations he evoked in me worth losing the independence I had desperately craved?

***

Chapter Twelve

Ash

For years, I’d been a chronic insomniac, only sleeping when I filled myself with enough alcohol to drown the demons that tormented me. Tonight, I slept because a small, feisty woman guarded my dreams and protected my soul. The blinding sunlight woke me up to find myself restrained by long hair that was every-fucking-where, including in my mouth.

Lucrezia had stayed with me the entire night and clung to me like I was a buoy and she was adrift on the ocean. I tried to move, but she tightened her grip. What the fuck was I supposed to do now?

I hadn’t fucked her last night, but this was more intimate than that. I’d actuallysleptwith a woman for the first time. Lucrezia slowly lifted her head and stared at me with those huge brown eyes that displayed every emotion that I wanted to drown in. She was my weakness and that fucking terrified me because nothing had left a vulnerability in my armour before.

“Morning.” Lucrezia watched me as if she was getting ready for me to hit her, and that made me feel like a complete asshole.

“Hey.” I put my arm that wasn’t around her under my head and stared at the ceiling because the expression in her eyes terrified me.

She chewed the side of her lip and stared at me until I finally gave her my attention. “This has to stop, Lucrezia. You worry about what your papa thinks, but Xavier and Jordan will skin me alive as well for even contemplating what is in my head. You’re their little sister and I’m their closest friend.”

She studied me for so long that I thought she was going to run away in a flood of tears or have a tantrum fit. Lucrezia shocked the shit out of me when she straddled my waist and stared down at me.

“Is your only objection what my family and your friends think?”

“Those are the people who know me best, Lucrezia. If they think I’m not good enough for you, maybe you should listen to them.”

She pressed her forehead to mine, her breath mingled with mine while her hands griped my shoulders. “I’ve spent my life doing what others wanted. You’re the only person who saw through the illusion of an airhead socialite who spends all day painting her nails and gossiping with her friends.”

My lips twitched. “Sounds like a busy day.”

Her nails dug into my shoulders and I wanted to groan at that bite of pain. “Seriously, Ash. Tell me that you feel nothing for me and I’ll never bother you again.”

That was the problem with this situation—I felt too much for her. She was the perfect woman for me with her sass and determination. I wanted her more than I should because she wasn’t just forbidden fruit, she was the poison apple that would herald my demise.

“We can’t, Lucrezia.” My hands gripped her waist to try and move her, but all that did was make her grip me harder with her knees and squirm on top of me. My dick was certainly paying attention to the situation and started to harden under that luscious ass. Her nightdress had ridden up her thighs to expose her long, tanned legs and the red lace panties she was wearing.

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