Page 61 of Midnight Secrets

“That girl has had hearts in her eyes for you for years. She went quiet after she saw you with that girl in Rome, hiding every time you arrived in Tuscany. Then you ride in as her white knight. What the fuck did you think would happen?”

“What?” I had zero clue what he was talking about.

“Seriously? You never noticed her?”

My brow furrowed. “She was Xavier’s little cousin. She was shy and tended to hide from everyone.”

He rolled his eyes at me. “She hid from you, not everyone.”

This situation was even more fucked up than I imagined.

Jordan’s phone chimed. He stared down at it and his shoulders sank in relief. “She’s been out for a run and is on her way back. Fucking idiot. I’ll strangle her when I get my hands on her.”

He’d have to wait in line because I was tying her to the bed and leaving her there.

Minutes felt like hours as the clock tormented me in the corner. I picked up my phone and sent another text.

No reply.

I dialled her number and the phone was turned off. “She’s either blocked me or her phone is off.”

Jordan lifted his phone. “Fuck it all to hell and back!” He strode into the hall. “Francis!”

I knew without anyone having to tell me. Each step weighed heavily on my soul as I walked upstairs. Her cases were gone and her stuff with them. The only thing that remained of hers was underwear in the dirty laundry hamper in my bathroom because Francis would never think to look there for any of her stuff.

I’d taken some beatings in my life, but I’d never been sucker-punched like this before.

Lucrezia was gone. She’d fucking walked straight out of my life without a backward glance. Worse was the moment that I realised she had taken my worthless heart with her.

“I’m not going to ask, because Lucas would kill both of us.” Jordan stood watching me at the door. “But right now, you look the way I felt when I had to let Megan go.”

“I was trying to protect her,” I whispered, nausea burning a path up my throat.

“I know.” His hand landed on my shoulder. “It doesn’t ease the pain. All these years later, she’s still the only woman I want and can’t have.”

“My father would destroy her just to watch me in pain.”

His hand tightened in understanding. “One day she’ll understand. Just not today.”

It was true that you only realised the value of something when it wasn’t there anymore. Lucrezia had been more valuable than that entire room of diamonds. She was the rarest of all the precious stones because she was a pure soul in the middle of our fucked-up existence.

Jordan poured the drinks and we drank ourselves into oblivion. Maybe enough alcohol could numb the pain since I was drowning under the emotional weight of it. Staring at the moon outside the window, I knew she was out there somewhere and I couldn’t reach her. Why the fuck had I pushed her away? Everything only made sense when she was with me, Lucrezia was the only one who made me feel in a world of numbness.

I studied Jordan and saw the same pain on his face. He walked away from the love of his life to keep her safe. Could I really do the same? Could I stand and watch as some cocky asshole stood beside her and took her to bed to fuck her politely?

A beast roared free in my chest. I would rip the hand of any man who even considered touching her. This life had taken so much from me, I refused to let it have the one thing I truly desired. Lucrezia may have walked away but she’d signed a contract that bound her to me and I would use any means in my power to make her mine. That cold, deadly darkness enveloped me until it froze my soul. I was a Blackwood and we took what we wanted.

***

Chapter Twenty-Three

Lucrezia

The woman staring back at me didn’t look like me. Her face was puffy, her eyes were red, and her hair was a crazy mess on top of her head that something had probably nested in two nights ago when I arrived here to crawl under the duvet.

Francis sometimes brought me food to tempt me, but nothing appealed to me enough to eat it. My phone lay turned off beside my bed, and my case still lay where it fell on the floor. If I didn’t love him, I probably would have been happy enough to stay there. Once the realisation hit that he owned my heart, the need to protect myself from further destruction made me find shelter to lick my wounds.

How had everything gone so wrong?

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