Page 167 of Never In My Wildest Dreams

His heart.

The absolute love of his fucking life.

He’d walked away from her.

Once he saw it, his partners, the Marchauds…everything else became background noise. And with every mile, the panic grew.

Because he knew her. Knew what she’d gone through. Of course, she’d freak out to learn that George was a woman.

And instead of reassuring her, instead of giving her the transparency she needed—I’ve never been attracted to her. I don’t see her that way—instead of easing her mind, he’d decided what they had wasn’t real, and he’d gone back to work.

As soon as he got off the plane in Ontario, he found the nearest empty seat and pulled out his phone. First, he called George.

She answered immediately. “Oh, thank God. I’ve texted you a hundred times. I messed it all up. I’m sorry. I was so nervous meeting my idol, and I couldn’t stop babbling, and I ruined everything. All I wanted was to let her know you’re a good guy and that she can trust you—I mean, you slept in the same bed with me as a teenager, and you didn’t make a move—but I made it sound like we were fuck buddies.”

That’s exactly what it sounded like.How could he have been so insensitive? His gut churned, and he felt sick to his stomach.What’s she thinking right now?He’d left her miserable and doubting his feelings. “It’s not your fault. It’s all on me. I did what I always do. I got my little baby feelings hurt, and I ran.”

He’d done it with his friends.

He’d done it with his mother.

And he’d done it with Marcus.

“It’s not baby feelings.” George got even more worked up. “Being kicked out of a friend group is one of those mile-markers in life, and I can’t even imagine finding out my dad wasn’t my biological father. But look at you. You’ve never let any of it hold you back. You just keep building your life and your career…I admire you.”

“I walk away. That’s what I do. There’s nothing to admire about that.”

“Everyone sees Booker, the smart businessman, but only a few of us get to see the real you, the man with a huge heart. And this time, with Lorelei, you showed her all of you. You fell in love. Of course you’re going to be triggered when it falls apart. Do you want me to go see her? I can set her straight.”

“No. I’m the one who needs to apologize. It was my job to earn her trust.” And if she’d let him, he would do just that. No more running. He would tell her as many times as she needed to hear that he loved her and that he knew without a shadow of a doubt there was no one else in the world for him.

“I shouldn’t have told those stupid stories,” George said.

“You’re right.Ishould’ve told them to her before she even met you. She needs transparency. I don’t think of you as a woman?—”

“Hey, now,” she joked.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”

“I know how you meant it.”

“But I should’ve told her everything, so she wouldn’t have had to make stories up in her head.”

“Okay, so what can I do?”

“I’m quitting.”

“No. Dammit, Booker. I told them this would happen if they didn’t let you work remotely, but they called bullshit. Said you had too much invested in this agency to walk away. But they didn’t see you with Lorelei and Stevie. You’re your best self out there.”

“I know.” The idea of going back to the concrete and steel world of New York City…it was unthinkable. In Calamity, he had wide open spaces where he could think and breathe. He had his friends.

Fuck. He had his friends back. He would never take that for granted.

And he had his daughter. There was no way he’d miss out on soccer games and dance recitals. No way some stepdad would be there to help her through her first breakup.

Not a chance.

“Are you going to start your own agency? Because there’s a noncompete clause.”

---