Page 53 of Never In My Wildest Dreams

The time she’d gotten off a call with her manager and A&R team and come into the kitchen to find Cissy all flushed. She’d thought it was the hot, humid summer. But now she was thinking they’d just had sex.

On the tour bus, when she was sleeping—crashed out from yet another performance—did the two of them sneak into the hallway bathroom? No, that space was too small. Where then? Where did they have sex? Was it backstage while Lorelei did her meet and greet? In Cis’s bunk?

Even if they wrote up a list of every time and place and handed it to her, she still wouldn’t be able to let it go and move on.

“No.” She sipped her cocoa, the cool whipped cream a delicious contrast to the hot, creamy chocolate. “I wouldn’t.”

“Then, stop. The only thing you can control is you. If you think you had a part in it?—”

“I did. I absolutely did. I was so ambitious that I neglected my relationships.”

“Hey. You arenotthe reason they betrayed you. They could’ve made any number of choices, but they chose to lie and deceive you.”

“You’re right.”

“Did fuckface ever talk to you? Tell you he felt neglected? Did he say, ‘Hey, I miss you. Grab a suitcase. We’re playing hooky this weekend.’”

“Never. I swear I didn’t have a single clue he was unhappy.”

“Then, how could you fix things?” He sat forward, leaning toward her, his hand squeezing her thigh. “It’s not your fault.”

She nodded and gave him a faint smile. “Guess you’re not the only one who believed in something that turned out to be fake.”

He sat back. “Can I ask a question?”

“Sure.” She knew she sounded wary, but she couldn’t blame him for wanting more information. If she didn’t want him to figure things out, she needed to shut her mouth.

“Are all three people part of the same betrayal?”

“No. My mom’s is on a whole other level.”

“Your mom? This is why you said we have things in common?”

“Oh, trust me. You might not like your parents’ choice, but at least they wanted what’s best for you. My mom’s the most self-serving person you’ll ever meet.” She shook her head in disgust.

If he was shocked, he didn’t show it.

The lawsuits were all over the news, so she wouldn’t bring them up. Besides, that part was the least traumatic. “My parents divorced when I was six, and from that moment on, I was told my dad didn’t care about me. At the beginning of this year, I found out my mom lied about everything. Not only did he love me and want me, but he was the one who’d supported my dreams all along. I honestly don’t know if I can ever forgive her for what she did. I have siblings I’m just getting to know because they chose to live with my dad.” Frankly, once her mom recognized Lorelei’s talent, she’d had no use for her other two kids.

“I’m starting to see why you’ve been here for three months.” He wound the throw’s fringe around a finger. “Did she give you a reason?”

“Well, first off, I don’t think she meant to divorce him. I think she was trying to manipulate him. She wanted to move to a bigger house, closer to the city, and he couldn’t do that. She thought if she took his kids and left him with an empty house, he’d beg her to come back.”

“And he didn’t?”

“No. I asked him about it not long ago. He said he didn’t want his kids to grow up in a home where their parents didn’t love each other and blackmail was a way of life.”

“Did he know about the lies she told you?”

She noticed he hadn’t touched his cocoa. “Oh, God, no. If he had, he’d have done something about it. He thought…well, I guess he thought I was just like her.”

“So, where do you and your mom stand right now?”

“I don’t have anything to say to her. Even if I could forgive her—and believe me, I’m not there yet—I don’t want a relationship with her. It took me till my mid-twenties, but I finally drew a boundary, and I’m not going to put up with toxic relationships.”

“I guess that means she hasn’t apologized?”

“Oh, no. She’s the victim in everything. She’d never see herself as the problem. In her mind, she truly believes my dad’s awful and that she did the best thing in the world for me.”

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