Page 42 of When You Were Mine

“Right, but we were supposed to leave together. He bailed at the last minute and didn’t give me an explanation. At least not one that made sense. And I had to piece together a story over many, many years from the information I got from family and friends.”

She had his attention.

“Take it from me, she’s not going to hear your side of the story and throw herself into your arms. Not with the fortress of resentment she’s built around her. She needs to get to know you again. You think, after thirty years, you can say, ‘Oh, I never stopped loving you,’ and she’ll believe you?” She shook her head. “Not a chance. I promise she’s going to be even angrier. Why didn’t you come back a month later? Two years? She probably would’ve given you five years to get your shit together. But thirty? Forget it.”

“You don’t understand?—”

“I don’t need to understand the details. Trust me. They won’t matter to her. Actions matter. Especially when the first time she sees you, you’reengaged. Andshe’splanning the wedding.”

Anxiety tightened his chest, and he found it hard to breathe. “I’m going to tell her we broke it off.”

“And then what? If we’re not engaged, why are you here? Why would you show up at a tasting if we’re not getting married?”

Fuck. Shit. “You’re right.” He couldn’t think clearly. He was powered by need, desire… Desperation.

Darby sat up, pressing her hands flat on the mattress. “The thing is…when I was talking to Emil—and believe me, he’s a man of few words. He’s all broody, dark energy…big, deep feelings…fire-in-his-eyes kind of guy. But as I was talking to him, I thought, ‘What exactly do I want from him?’”

“He lives here, and you live in North Carolina. Is either of you willing to move?”

“Well, we haven’t gotten that far.” She let out a bitter laugh. “But, yeah, it’s more than that. The relationship I mourn is gone. And that’s probably true for you and Jessica too. So, maybe the best we can hope to get is closure.”

No.The best was to have her back fully.

“I guess what I’m saying is, I’d hate for us to end our engagement only to find out there’s nothing there with our exes. Nothing but memories of a first love.”

“Everything you say makes sense, but it’s different for Elzy and me. There willalwaysbe something there. It’s more than love with her. It’s…” He tapped his heart. “She’s in here. She’ll never be anywhere else.”

“If that’s true, then why did you stay away for thirty years?”

Desperation clawed at him. Every instinct in his body screamed to be with her, but Darby was making him think things through. If he had one shot at winning Elzy back, he couldn’t go crashing through her door.

So, he sat on the edge of the bed. “I didn’t. The first time I tried to get her back, she ignored me. The second time, a crisis came up I had to deal with. And the last time was six years after we broke up. I found out she was working at a resort in Idaho. I flew out there with a ring in my pocket, but I saw she had a husband and a kid, and I knew I’d be a piece of shit if I tried to break up a marriage. Afamily.”

He'd been broken. His dreams, his hopes… Everything he’d wanted had been irretrievably destroyed.Because of me. It had been the hardest time of his life.

“Okay, so, what’s changed—other than her children might be grown now? If she’s still married, are you willing to rock her entire world in the hopes of rekindling something?”

“That’s a fair question. If she’s happily married, then no. I’ll walk away. But I have to find out and there’s nothing about her personal life on social media. She’s very private.”

Darby smiled. “Well, you two have that in common.”

“But I hear you. I get it. I’ll go slower.”Go. Talk to her. Every second he wasn’t with her was a wasted opportunity. He got up and headed to the door, his blood pounding in his ears.

“What’s your plan?” she asked. “If you want to win her back, we need to stay engaged.”

He cut her a look. “Darby, I can’t marry you. Even if she’s happily married and can never forgive me, now that I’ve been in the same room with her, it’s…” He let out a breath. “There’s a reason I’ve never gotten married.”

She raised a hand to stop him. “I’m not holding you to anything. It was a crazy, impulsive idea. I get it. But you have to think about this. Jessica’s a busy woman. She owns a resort and travels the world for consulting jobs. What will you do?” She smiled. “The offer to work with me is still on the table.”

If he could choose how to spend every day of his life, he’d be in bed with Elzy. Cooking for her, riding horses, or hiking on their ranch. Even just sitting quietly reading books together while holding hands. When her career took her to places like Iceland, he’d go with her. He’d carry her luggage. Refill her water bottle.

But he understood that wasn’t a viable plan.She owns a resort and is tight with her family. She’s busy. She might not need a provider, but she’d certainly want a man who was active and pursuing his own goals. “I hear you, and I’ll figure something out.” He headed for the door. “To be clear, I’m not going to lie to her. I’ll participate in the tastings, but I’m not going to say we’re engaged or deceive her about us getting married. I’ve done enough damage—I won’t lie to her face. And when the opportunity comes to tell the truth, I’m going to do it. Are you okay with that?”

“Yeah, of course.” She smiled at him with a look of admiration. “You’re something else, Trev. Your determination’s got me all fired up. I don’t know what can happen with Emil, but I can’t help wondering if something might come of this. So, okay. I won’t lie, either. And I won’t make it sound like we’re planning a wedding. I’ll just give my opinion on the best chef for the resort.” That gleam hit her eyes again.

“What? No games.”

“Maybe a teeny one.” She put two fingers together with very little space between them. “Does she know how to drive a stick?”

---