Page 77 of When You Were Mine

“What do you mean?Iceland?”

“After you left, I remembered a consulting offer I’d gotten, and since I’d arranged to take the time off anyway…I went ahead and took it.”

“That’s crazy. I’ve always wanted to go there.”

“It’s a surreal place, that’s for sure. But there’s something we need to talk about.” Maybe she could save this relationship after all. She’d held back so much of herself. Maybe if they talked through their problems, they’d get to something deeper. “It makes me sad that you had no idea where I was.”

“Well, you didn’t tell me.”

“Right, but don’t you think it’s odd that we haven’t talked to each other since you left?”

“I told you how crazy it’s been here. We had to find an attorney, call the banks?—”

“Joel. We’re engaged. And you cut me out of your Christmas plans to take care of your daughter. If we’re going to be married, shouldn’t I be part of that family?”

“I can see how you’d feel that way.” His tone was level, composed.

Just like a lawyer. “Yeah, it hurt. And to be honest, that’s the real reason I took this job.”

“I wasn’t blowing you off. I just don’t think it’s the best time to introduce you to them.”

She gave him a moment, hoping he’d hear what he said.

“I mean, you’ll be my family too,” he said a little too quickly. “But right now, my daughter needs me.”

“Well, of course. But it’s Christmas, and you dumped me like I was some woman you’re seeing, and I guess this time apart has made me think about things, and something doesn’t feel right with us.”

“Jess, come on. If something like this happened to your sisters, you wouldn’t even hesitate to drop me. Your family’s always come first. You’ve made that clear from the beginning.”

Her heart sank. He was right about that. “Let me ask you something, okay?”

“Of course. Anything.”

“Why do you want to marry me? What about me makes you want to spend your life with me?”

He gave an uncomfortable laugh. “My ex asked the same question.”

She got that he was living under his ex-wife’s roof and dealing with a serious family matter, but she didn’t like that they were having intimate conversations.About me.Yeah, something was definitely wrong. She hadn’t seen it because she’d been so preoccupied with the resort. “And what did you tell her?”

“That I’d never met a woman more intelligent. Someone who challenges me intellectually.”

“Your ex is an attorney.”

“True. But you’re caring too, and she’s very much like me—all business. The way you look after your sisters, nieces, and nephews, the way you hold your family together… I admire that. My ex never cared about creating family traditions. She has eighty-hour weeks, and she wants to relax over a holiday—not decorate, cook, and wrap. Thanksgiving and Christmas meals were—and still are—catered. But you, you push through your exhaustion because you care so much about your family’s experience. Even in your twenties, you put in the extra effort to make sure your sisters came downstairs to see presents under the tree. In the middle of launching a resort, you’re helping plan your niece’s wedding.”

Those reasons were not as flattering as he might think. None of them had to do with a sizzling connection, a bond, or anything romantic at all. But also, he’d pointed out something important. She did a great job juggling all the balls—except for one. Him. She hadn’t prioritized him at all.

That’s so sad.

I was going to marry this man.

And it really drove home what Amber said. She could guard her heart, or she could be brave.

Let’s do that.

Let’s be brave.

“I love you, Jess. I really do. I don’t know if I’m giving you the right words. I’m not a man who’s in touch with my feelings. But I know you make my life better.”

---