Page 90 of Wild Card

I eyed her stomach, finally not hidden under a massive sweatshirt, and hoped she’d consider telling me what was going on. There wasn’t really anything different. The shirt looked a little tight, but there wasn’t anything amiss.

She finally looked up from her snack. Her hair was up in a top knot, her face clear of any makeup. It had been a while since I’d seen her this undone.

“I’m not ready.” Her bottom lip wobbled.

I sat next to her silently, waiting to see if she’d say anything else.

“You’ve been ignoring your phone,” Taylor suddenly said, pulling herself up from the floor.

“I’ve just been busy.” I shrugged, hoping to avoid this conversation.

Again.

Taylor had tried to get me to call Decker, have an official conversation in the daylight, without the chance to have Leo break it up. She’d held me after he’d gone, but the next day I had acted like nothing had happened.

“Don’t leave without answering him or talking to him. He’s swung by the house every day, but Leo won’t let him past.”

I moved on to the top shelf of my closet. It held things from my childhood, and I thought maybe I shouldn’t take those things with me. I was starting a new life, with a stranger. Jeff had sent a courier to deliver the engagement ring I’d selected online. It was so massive and horrible, and I completely hated it. I’d always imagined if I were to be proposed to, it would be with a ring that was minimal, something the guy I loved had worked hard to afford…not something that was just another purchase for him.

I wanted there to be love put into the decision, I wanted to know he had selected it for me on purpose, for a specific reason.

Instead, I’d received the ring while I was alone. I slid it onto my finger then instantly took it off. Then I cried and cleaned the kitchen. Taylor eventually saw it, and her eyes bugged out at how big it was. She even made jokes about how I wouldn’t be able to hold my hand up, and she wasn’t wrong. I had no idea how I was going to stomach seeing it on my hand every day.

“You know who else has been calling?” I turned toward her.

My sister scrunched her nose. “That bastard?”

I nodded. “Oh yeah. Begging for me to hear him out, says he fell for me…how sweet, right?” I laughed, and it actually felt good.

Taylor’s entire face lit up with humor. “Oh my god…Elias is so pathetic.”

I heaved two boxes away from the closet and toward my bedroom door, chuckling under my breath. “I just wish I knew why he thought he could squeeze his arrangement into an actual marriage.”

“I am so glad I didn’t go that night. I can’t imagine what he would have done with holding that over my head.” Taylor grabbed one of my suitcases and helped tug it out to the living room. “By the way…” She reached down and grabbed my tablet. “Did you happen to read the latest article from that place you wanted to intern at?” She tapped away at the screen.

My chest pinched at the loss of my dream. I’d decided to be entirely immature about the loss and never read anything done by the group again. It just seemed easier.

“No, I don’t think I can.”

She made a humming sound. “Well, I’d definitely read this…in fact, I insist that you do.”

Why did she care? I was way too selfish to care about social injustice. I’d turned into the worst version of myself as I buried my dream, lost the only man I’d ever loved, and now had to marry a stranger and take over a job I didn’t want to do.

She walked over to me and slid the tablet into my hand. “I know a car will be here to get you to take you to New York, but read this…okay? Promise me.”

I gently gripped the device and swallowed. Her blue eyes were so sincere, and she hadn’t been sincere like this, ever…I had to do it. “Okay, I will.”

She leaned in and hugged me tight then swiped under her eyes.

The front door opened a second later, revealing Leo and my driver.

“I gotta go.” I cleared my throat, nearly ready to cry. “I’ll see you next weekend. Once I’m settled, I’m headed back to Dad’s, so…I’ll see you then. We’re going to see each other all the time.” My voice hitched.

Taylor nodded furiously, but more tears streaked down her face. “I know. I just…I’m going to miss you.”

I couldn’t hold it in. I choked on a sob, pulling my sister to my chest. I hugged her so tightly I didn’t think either of us were breathing.

“You did this for me. I was supposed to do it…” Taylor cried into my neck, whispering her confession.