Page 57 of King of Hearts

I held my hand out and helped Taylor up. The nurse gave us both an apologetic look while Taylor grabbed her purse.

Once we were out the door, we walked right past Dr. Kline’s office. The door was still closed, and not a single siren or security guard moved while we passed by.

Once we were clear of the building, Taylor looked up at me.

“Did you hurt him?”

I shrugged, shoving my free hand in my pocket.

“Did you kill him?” she clarified quietly, like shame coated each word.

“I should have.” I blinked at the bright sun. It was getting later in the afternoon; the shine should have dulled by now, especially for how late in October it was.

“So you did hurt him?” We turned the corner and headed into a glass elevator.

“Taylor, I’m going to hurt anyone who touches you. Period.”

She stared up at me in shock as the doors opened. This entire ruse was getting away from me. I’d never been this protective of a single person in my life, but the idea of anyone touching her—it made my blood boil. I wondered, not for the first time, if I should just come clean and offer her my black, bleeding heart.

What would she do with it though? She had no use for it, and none for me…I was merely a lucky break; any other guy could have fit the role. With that idea in mind, I bit my tongue and held back any other wandering thoughts.

Chapter Twenty

My stomach seemedto pinch with panic as every minute passed and we waited for the ultrasound technician to call my name. Juan took a seat in the waiting room, tugging my hand until I was sitting next to him. I couldn’t explain to him how embarrassed I felt. Juan used to make snide remarks about how much of an easy lay I was, how I was essentially a slut with an open ticket to anyone who wanted a ride.

I had never explained to anyone why I had sex as frequently as I did, and I guess it honestly didn’t matter. Once someone made up their mind about you, you would be hard-pressed to change it. I didn’t care what others thought of me, except for Juan. His opinion mattered very much to me. I could feel myself begin to shut down, just like I had back in the spring after Juan came in and told me he had wished I would just disappear.

My chest tightened as assumptions and that inner voice began to speak and tell me I was worthless and didn’t deserve to be a mother. My fight-or-flight instincts kicked in, mocking me and telling me to just give up already and run. I nearly choked on the sob working its way up my throat, then suddenly my phone vibrated on my knee.

Fatima:Hey girl, didn’t hear from you…how did the ultrasound go? You know I’ll be waiting on a picture of that baby.

It was like an air mask had been placed over my face, filling my lungs with air. I inhaled a silent breath and decided to face Juan and whatever it was he thought of me.

Looking over at him, I tried to gather the tiny specks of bravery I had gathered, knowing it would be like trying to hold on to sand.

“I never encouraged him…I know you must think the worst of me, but I never once asked for anything from him. From the beginning he set up our appointments in that way, explaining that it was normal and telling me to relax.”

I looked down at my stomach. I wanted to throw up. He’d taken advantage of me, and the realization hadn’t really hit until now.

Rubbing my forehead, I felt tears burn behind my eyes. God, I was so stupid. Of course it would be me who would get taken advantage of, simply because I was naïve. Self-hate smothered me. I didn’t deserve to be a mother. I didn’t deserve to be in Juan’s life, or to have his protection.

“Taylor Beck.” A man wearing green scrubs stepped out, holding a clipboard.

Juan grumbled under his breath. “Great, another Beckham lookalike.”

Threading our fingers together, he walked in behind me. The room was dark and quiet with two large screens set up along the wall to our right. In the middle was a plush leather medical chair, already reclined.

“Go ahead and sit down, and your husband can sit over there, next to you,” the tech advised, typing away on his computer.

I didn’t correct him regarding Juan. Instead, I settled into the plush chair while Juan took my purse and set it next to the chair next to mine.

“Okay.” He turned toward me holding a hand towel. “I’m going to tuck this into the band of your shorts, but I’ll have you unbutton them first, please.” My eyes immediately went to Juan, now unsure who was being honest and who was just taking advantage.

Juan’s gaze was already on the tech, who seemed to grow red under his inspection.

“Give us a second, please,” Juan asked, moving to take the white cloth from the man’s hand.

“Sure, just pop your head out when you’re ready.” He rolled his stool to the desk and then left us alone.

---