Page 171 of Don't Leave Me

45

Chapter 45

The almost-full moon light crept through the curtains as I laid on my side, Jack spooning me and sleeping soundly. He had fallen asleep almost immediately after we came. I watched the sun set from the bed, then the moon rise in the sky, trying my hardest not to think of what had really happened that day. I daydreamed and wrote stories in my head. I thought of songs that I hadn’t heard in years. I had finished my book by the time it was 8 PM and there I was, still laying still while Jack napped peacefully next to me. I hated to say it, but I was bored out of my mind. I wanted a new book, or a laptop to write on, or anything to keep my mind busy.

“Jack,” I whispered, turning my head to him.

He blinked as he stirred awake, his innocent, boyish face so pure at that moment.

“What’s wrong, love?” his asked, his voice coarse from the sleep.

“Can we do something? I can’t sleep. It’s only 8 PM,” I moaned as Jack turned on the lamp on the night stand.

“Of course. I didn’t mean to sleep. I wanted to send out some photos anyway. Emily sent us the ones from today,” he slowly got out of bed and picked up his phone that laid on the counter near the TV.Had it been there that whole time? Jack trusted me to not quietly sneak up and get it while he slept? What would I even do if I had access to a phone again? We were married - there wasn’t much I could do now.

I wished I had something to write with - my phone, my laptop, a typewriter. No, I needed the internet to research certain things, search for synonyms for words I used too often. I liked to google places I wrote about, get a feel for them, explore google maps. Writing would cure some boredom. Who knew if Jack would ever let me out of his sight again? Would Jack ever trust me to be on my own without him? He couldn’t take me with him everywhere - and I couldn’t be cooped up in the loft forever. I needed to run, to create, to find new books, at the very least.

“When will I be able to use my phone again?” I asked curiously as Jack scrolled through something on his phone.

He looked up at me curiously.

“I’m your wife now. I want you to trust me,” I went on gently, holding the sheets to my chest as I sat up.

“You told Billie everything 3 nights ago. I think you need to prove yourself faithful a little longer, sweetheart,” Jack smiled smugly, raising his eyebrows at me like he was scolding a child.

Fair point well made. He could tell I was defeated.

“We’ll go to the bookstore on our way to our honeymoon spot. I’m making arrangements for us in Lake George now,” he smiled, sitting down on the bed in front of me. “But I don’t think you’ll need much distraction there. I plan to keep you very busy,” he went on, his voice low and husky.

There were those butterflies again. I gave him a slow, crooked smile.

“So if I behave on our honeymoon?”

I was afraid to keep pushing it, but he seemed like he was in a good mood.

“I’ll think about it, Hana,” he snapped, clearly over the subject - I was shattering the image of a happy wife for him too much.

I looked down at my hands.

“Perhaps I’d feel better if you had an afternoon with Emily and prove yourself that way. When we’re back in the city,” he finally said, his voice gentle again.

I looked up at him and nodded. Finally, there was some hope for a semblance of a “normal” life. He clearly trusted Emily more than I thought, maybe because she was so on board with us together.

I nodded. “I’d like that.”

Jack lifted his phone up. “Now help me pick a couple of photos for us to post. You’ll post one first, then I will.”

I nodded and smiled again, then scooted closer to him and put my head on his shoulder, watching him look through Emily’s vast collection of photos she took of us earlier. I could tell Jack was pleased with my gesture - he gently placed his lips atop my head and continued to scroll.

“I like that one,” I pointed to a photo of us on the city hall stairs, me standing behind Jack and resting my head on his back, my left hand up to his arm, the other around his waist, Jack holding my right hand with both of his.

I really did like it - I felt like it wasn’t really me I was looking at, but the Barbie doll that Jack had created of me.

“It’s lovely. You can post that one then,” he smiled down at me. “What should I post?” he kept scrolling.

He stopped at the picture of him holding onto me and me smiling, the laugh that I gave Emily when I realized how ironic it was that she was giving us orders.

“This one,” he confirmed out loud. “I love this one.”