Page 58 of Don't Leave Me

“I’ll let you go then, Hana,” he muttered.

I wanted to break down again. I wanted to beg him to just tell him that he loved me, or at least was on that path. But all I could do was shrug, feeling sorry for myself yet again.

“Fine,” I sighed, and hung up before I heard any more heartbreaking things from him, especially not wanting to hear him tell me goodbye.

I looked towards Emily’s door and it was cracked open. Did I leave that open or did she open it to hear my conversation? Either way, there’s no way I can explain that conversation to her without sobbing again.

I walked in and Emily sat cross-legged on the floor and looked up at me with wide, sad eyes. I’m sure my blotchy, red crying face gave it all away.

“Wanna talk about it?” she asked quietly.

I immediately shook my head. “No. Turn the music back up,” I said, wanting any and every distraction possible.

By 8 PM, Emily and I had the grand idea to dress up and start wandering around the neighborhood to look for bars. Emily’s apartment was literally right across the street from NYU, so I felt extremely flattered as we walked down the street, crowds of young guys staring at us with their mouths open, turning their heads as we walked past them. Emily nudged me with her elbow and glanced at me with a sly smile.

“I’m gonna like it here,” she giggled.

We spotted a bar a couple blocks down and Emily and I fell in love with the place immediately. It sort of had a speakeasy vibe, the lighting dim and intimate, and it wasn’t too crowded or hipster-ish – it felt very Manhattan, which was a nice change. We sat at the bar and the bartender came to us immediately; he was a handsome 30something with dark hair and a charming smile.

“Hello, ladies. What can I get you two?” he asked, looking between the two of us.

“I’ll have a white wine,” Emily responded in her sultry, I’m-sexy tone.

I turned to her. “Feeling fancy tonight?” I teased her.

She giggled and nodded. “Make that two,” she said to the handsome bartender.

He smiled at us and walked to the other side of the bar.

“Sure, I’ll have white wine as well,” I said sarcastically to her, raising my eyebrows.

She grinned at me. “You love white wine!” she defended. “And white wine loves you,” she laughed.

Handsome Bartender returned with our two glasses of white wine and lingered around.

“You two from around here?”

Emily answered for us. “I just moved here from Philly. Hana’s from Brooklyn,” she pointed her head to me.

He nodded, leaning against the bar. “Welcome. You’ll love it here,” he said to Emily, obviously more interested in her, which was fine with me; I still had Michael on my mind and as I sipped on my wine, I wanted nothing more than to call him.

“Hey,” Emily turned to me, totally ignoring Handsome Bartender. “Doesn’t Jack live around here? We should call him and Adam,” she went on, her eyes lighting up.

It felt like a lifetime ago when I last saw Jack, pre-panic attack and post-argument before going to the Bowery. And yes…he lived probably less than a mile from Emily’s place. It would be nice to see him, to take my mind off of everything going on with Michael.

“Yeah,” I shrugged to her, getting a little excited. “Let’s call them.”

I didn’t have the guts to call Jack myself, so Emily dialed Adam’s number and waited as she sipped on her glass of wine and as I eyed her curiously, waiting for a response.

“Hey, Adam?” she started, sounding so cool and nonchalant, like always. “Hey, it’s Emily…Yeah…What’s going on?” she paused. “Well, I just got a place in SoHo and Hana and I are out at this place called The Owl…Oh, really?…Yeah, you should totally come…Invite Jack too, Hana wants to see him,” she smiled at me, and I felt my face turn red. “Cool, see you guys soon,” she concluded and hung up.

“Really?” I scoffed with wide eyes – she knew what I was talking about.

She grinned to herself and shrugged innocently. “What? It’s true, Han! They’ll be here soon…both of them,” she raised an eyebrow.

I bit my lip. I was nervous to see Jack…excited, but nervous. I ordered another glass of white wine and Emily and I started chatting mindlessly as we always did; I felt myself being more talkative than usual, figuring it was just from the nerves of seeing Jack again, but I could tell that Emily was happy to see me bubbly.

“Hey ladies,” I heard a voice from behind us; I turned and Adam was smiling at us, Jack not far behind him.

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