Page 59 of Die For Me

I stood there for a moment watching Jack walk away, gathering my wits as my nipples hardened underneath my thin black T-shirt.

“Han!” Emily exclaimed from behind me.

I turned, and she stood. Her face was lit up likeIwas the rockstar in this room.

“Em.” I smiled back at her before I wrapped her in my arms.

“It’s so good to see you. Can you believe our boys are going to be fuckingfamous?” She laughed then turned to look at Adam who had just approached Jack.

They stood close together, talking alone, and Jack laughed loudly. He shook his head and turned to look at me. Adamfollowed his gaze, clearly confused. He turned to look back at Jack and quickly put his hand to his shoulder, smiling uneasily.

“I told him,” Emily blurted.

I turned to her with a frown. “You did?”

Her eyes were full of uncertainty. “You didn’t ask menotto,” she defended.

I nodded as I sighed. “It’s fine, Em. Let’s sit.” I motioned to the couch behind her. “Did you tell him…everything?” I asked curiously as I sat down and crossed my legs toward her.

She mirrored me as she nodded. “Yeah. He’s…he’s really surprised. I mean, I told himeverything. As I told him, it sounded so insane, but like…you’ve lived it. I can’t believe your strength, Hana.” She shook her head at me.

My face turned hot as I stared at her. I wasn’t sure how I felt about her last statement. I decided to ignore it.

“So…what, he’s accepted all of this?” I inquired quietly.

I looked over at the front of the room and realized Jack and Adam were starting to set up.

“I don’t know. He didn’t really talk about how he felt. That’s just…the way he is,” Emily answered.

I sighed and watched Jack warming up on the drums, doing a mic check as Adam played with buttons on his extensive guitar pedal. Adam looked uneasy; I wasn’t sure if it was nerves or if being close to Jack made him feel that way after what he’d learned. Jack looked content as he rested his hand on his thigh and then looked over at me. I went into full on groupie mode again when he winked at me and smiled.

“Are you doing okay? Are they treating you well?” Emily asked quietly, leaning into me.

I nodded. I knew she was concerned about me but I didn’t want to be looked at like I was some helpless victim. I used to be, but now I was in control.

“Like I said, Emily. I’m finally happy.”

That’s when the person maneuvering the camera yelled, “Quiet on set!”

The room went quiet. Emily and I looked at each other with wide eyes before we both turned back.

“Camera rolling. When you’re ready,” the camera person said to the guys.

I could see Jack’s chest moving up and down quickly before he nodded to Adam; Jack began banging on the drums perfectly in sync when Adam started stroking his guitar. Jack kept his eyes on his drums before he turned his head to his mic and began singing. This was the dark song Emily had told me about; I knew it as Jack began singing about heartache, betrayal, taking what’s his. He continued with the chorus, singing about how he was a fool, bloody hands, broken promises. Emily looked over at me, probably wanting to see my response to Jack’s words. All of these songs were written when I chose Michael, and it was clear how broken he felt about it. The song ended with Jack banging on his drums passionately. Jack looked over at me, out of breath, his eyes someplace else…in his dark, scary place that made my heart drop and my cheeks red hot.

Someone appeared out of nowhere with a mic in his hand and began asking Jack and Adam questions like where they were playing in NYC, when the album was coming out, and what inspired them to write the song they just played. Adam glanced over at Jack expectantly, raising his eyebrows at him.

Jack put the mic up to his mouth. “I wrote it when I was in a really dark place in my life. I was heartbroken and depressed and angry. The whole album is basically based around that.” He smiled shyly.

He looked so nervous as he spoke, but they finished the interview quickly. The next song they played was the one about the monster and its prey that I had heard weeks ago. It soundedeven better the second time around. Soon enough, they were done.

I sighed heavily, not realizing I was shaking until I let out my uneven breath.

“You okay?” Emily asked as we stood.

I feigned a smile, the one she had believed for weeks until she learned the truth.

“Yeah.” I nodded.

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