Page 100 of Beneath Cherry Blossom Memories

We both share a cry and an intense stare. I’m fucking panting, he’s wetting his lips. And the best part is that I can see the rehab facility in the background. The familiar paintings on the wall from the video tour we looked at on New Year’s. “You’re beautiful,” I whisper.

He blushes, wiping his eyes. “So are you. How’s the tour?”

“You know how the tour is. It’s in my novel.”

He laughs, and it’s the sweetest sound. God damn, I want to leave. I want to run to himright now.“Only a few more weeks, and I’ll be there.”

“Gonna come visit me?” he teases, but it’s weak. I can tell he needs me. Fuck, I knew he would need me, and here I am, living the rockstar life, getting drunk and being selfish.

“Yes,” I declare. “The second I hit the fucking ground, I’m coming for you.”

He chews his cheek, staring directly into my eyes. “I made a friend. I think. Maybe.”

“Yeah?” There’s a pinch of jealousy, but I ignore it. He needs friends—other people.

“Little fucker named Patrick.” He has a small smirk on his lips as he gets comfortable on the sofa. “He’s like a wizard at checkers. I can’t beat him.”

“Checkers?” I ask through a wet laugh.

“Yeah. It’s either that or Monopoly. No one sane plays Monopoly.”

“Obviously,” I agree.

That smile brightens. I’ve never seen him so clear, so radiant. It makes my chest hurt and split. “He also insists on sitting next to me in group. Think he wants my dick.”

“Like fuck he does,” I growl before I can stop myself.

Eli bites his lip. “Jealous, baby?”

I huff and roll my eyes but can’t help the grin. “Always.”

“Good to know you still want me.”

“Did you not read my texts? I’m going crazy over here without you. Like, it’s certifiable.”

“Are you proud of me?” he asks, a shy little question that catches me by surprise.

When I fumble with my words, he frowns. So I force my lips to cooperate. “Of course. Yes. Yes.”

“I should’ve been out already. All the other people who came when I did are in the outpatient program now.”

“Hey,” I say softly. “It’s alright. I don’t care how long it takes as long as it helps.”

“What if it never does?” His eyes drop, and the camera shakes. “What if I stay like this forever?”

“Then that’s just how it is. I don’t expect magic. That’s not reality. I know it’s going to be hard, some days it’s going to feel impossible. But that’s what I’m signing up for. I'll shoulder the rest of that weight if you feel like you’re not strong enough. You don’t have to deal with it alone anymore, Eli.”

He cries quietly, nodding. “Okay.”

“I love you.”

“I know,” he whispers. “I…have to go.”

“Already?”

He clears his throat and pretends to hear something. “Yeah. Gotta go…do therapy.”

It’s obvious he needs some space. Space I don’t want to give. We have an ocean and an entire continent of space between us, but I get it. He’s working through his shit. Swallowing a groan of protest, I nod. “Alright. Call me next time you can? I don’t care what time. I’ll answer.”

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