Page 41 of Beneath Cherry Blossom Memories
“Elijah?”
I look up and see a doctor standing there. First, I have to convince this guy to let me leave. I’m fine. I feel great, oddly enough. Preparing for more judgment, I study his face while he studies me. It’s creepy. Is he going to try and shove something plastic in my body?
“YouareElijah, right?”
“Yes,” I answer skeptically.
“Alright. So we were able to see some inflammation of your stomach lining.” I blink at him. “Have you been taking any medication lately on an empty stomach?”
All of them. But I don’t say that. “Sometimes.” I shrug.
He nods like I’m full of shit. “We also found a small gastric ulcer.”
That doesn’t sound great. “How did I get that?”
“In most cases, H.Pylori or taking over-the-counter NSAIDs on an empty stomach. Excessive drinking or smoking can cause it as well. Overly acidic food and drink items.”
“Can…,” fuck I’m really asking this, “can Vicodin cause it?”
“It can. Are you currently taking Vicodin?”
My lips purse while I debate being honest with this douche. “I have a prescription.”
He glances down at the tablet in his hand and sighs. “Elijah, are you aware that medical records are far more accessible to us now than they were when you were in high school?”
I don’t like what he’s insinuating here. “Yeah.”
“According to your file, you haven’t been prescribedanymedication, narcotic or otherwise, since April 24th, 2012. You were eighteen.”
“Then those are old records. Your…system or whatever hasn’t been updated. Ihaveprescriptions. I see doctors.” My tongue flaps like he will believe me. Like anyone will if I say it enough.
“If you are struggling with substance abuse, we have excellent counselors here who can assist. Because at this current point in time, if you change your eating habits, stop smoking and consuming alcohol, the ulcer and inflammation should heal on its own.”
“I am notabusinganything. I don’t know what it says on your fucking tablet, but it’s wrong. Okay? It’swrong.”
He sighs. “I can double-check. Just…think about what I said. I want to observe you for the rest of the night to make sure the vomiting stops. I’ll be back in a few hours.”
I fold my arms because fuck him for saying that. I’m not a drug addict.
I’mnot.
He doesn’t understand; no one does. What does this doctor know about the shit I live through? That I deal with every day? He doesn’t. No one knows what it’s like to grow up the way I did or to have still to face the woman who made it all so terrible. To have been denied love and compassion. Was I a little shit when I got older? Sure. What teenager isn’t?
But all I can remember is holding that stupid fucking ballet sign-up paper and seeing the disgust on Aunt Tracy’s face. Her cigarette ashes fell into my macaroni while she told me ballet is for girls and gays. I could’ve been something if it weren’t for her. Maybe not the best dancer out there, but decent. If I’d danced like I wanted to, I wouldn’t be in this hospital bed listening to some jackass talk about me like he’s read my diary.
If it weren’t for my parents dropping dead and leaving me to that witch, I might be a normal person. If my aunt’s “friends” didn’t like hanging out with little boys, then maybe I wouldn’t be so sexual. Maybe…
Phoenix walks in mere seconds after the doctor leaves. He ispissed.Light brown eyebrows furrowed, chimera eyes burning into my skull. Full lips downcast and the vein in his neck pumping. “This…this could’ve been so much worse,” he starts, not moving to close the space between us.
I shove myself upright so I’m not lying down for this. “The amount of blood,” he shudders, “looked like a fucking slasher movie.”
“Phoenix—”
“You’ve never seen a doctor because you are afraid of them. Why is that?” he asks, cocking his head like he knows the answer.
I swallow hard. No.Don’t do this, baby. Please.“It’s not like that.”
“Oh really? Then what’s it like, Elijah? Enlighten me.” He crosses his arms, so beautiful and livid with me that I get nauseous again. He only ever uses my full name when he's making a point. I have a feeling I won't like the one he's about to make.
