Page 70 of Beneath Cherry Blossom Memories

“No,” he sobs and rolls on top of me. I’m panting like I ran a marathon, shooting bullets from my eyes. His body crushes mine into the mattress, so I’m trapped and at his mercy.

My chin wobbles uncontrollably while he stares down at me with a look I’ve rarely seen before.Relief.“I’m not letting you go again unless it’ll help. I’ve let you go twice, and it has made everything worse. So don’t ask me to, alright? You wanted the olive branch? Well, it’s mine now. I have it, and I’m not giving it back.”

I whimper, needing to escape, but I know it’s my mind betraying my heart. This is what I’ve been silently pleading for. “Why? Why do you want me? I’m…,” I hiccup, “just like him.”

“And I abandoned him.” His eyes flicker with remorse. “I let him go. He might be my blood, but you’re my heart, Elijah. You’re my fucking heart, and I can’t live without it.” And he kisses me through the guttural sob that rips from my throat.

I can feel so much transferring through it. His love. His commitment. His unwavering loyalty. This manlovesme despite it all. We’ve killed each other, and this kiss is the serum we both need to come alive again.

Digging my fingers into his bare back, I let his tongue dance with mine. I’m filthy and repulsive, but he doesn’t care. Phoenix always finds the beauty in me no matter how much dirt it’s buried under.

Maybe I’ll be able to find it too because…fuck…I’m so tired of being ugly on the inside.

Phoenix

Takes All Night

Kelly is slumped at our dining table, nibbling a piece of burnt toast, no doubt, to soak up the acid in her stomach. I drop my eyes to the floor sheepishly and start some coffee. Last night…fuck. I hope it helps. I hope what I saidmatters. Eli and I stayed up for another hour kissing after I poured my heart out, and then eventually, I peeled my mouth away so he could sleep in my arms. He’s still asleep.

“What time is it?” Kelly groans.

“8:30.”

Another dramatic groan. “Why am I alive right now?” Her head thunks on the table.

“Because hangovers start early,” I tease, feeling lighter than I have in…fuck…years.

“Is Eli okay?” she asks against the wood. “Jorge texted me.”

I smile. Always looking out for me, that one. “Think so,” I say and fill up the coffee pot. “Hope so,” I tack on.

Her head lifts slightly, wincing at the light in the kitchen. “You know I don’t care that he’s here.”

My eyebrows zip together. “You don’t?”

“Of course not,” she says adamantly.

“I thought,” I shift on my feet, rubbing the back of my neck, “well, I thought you wouldn’t want him here because of everything that’s happened.”

“I can give second chances.” Her head thunks down again. “We all need them now and then.”

Crossing the space to the table, I throw my arms around her and hug her tight. “You’re the best, Kel.”

“I know,” she moans in pain. “Since I’m so great, can you get me some Tylenol?”

I laugh, kiss her head, and go to the bathroom. When I return with two pills and a cup of water, she mumbles thanks, and the coffee pot clicks off. “So I take it Jorge filled you in?” I ask, pouring us both a cup.

“Obviously,” she sighs and takes another bite of her toast. “God, this tastes like ass.”

I chuckle, sliding into the seat across from her. She takes the coffee mug with greedy fingers, forgoing the water. “What did you drink last night?”

“My great aunt’s box wine. It’s like juice, okay? Sweet and smooth. I had to leave my car there and catch an Uber. Think I might’ve thrown up in it.” She grimaces.

“I don’t remember a time I’ve ever been that drunk.”

“Because you don’t drink.”

“I have,” I argue, realizing how silly this is.

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