Page 29 of Strange Lad

I sputter, sagging onto my haunches further and gripping the back of my sofa for support.

He…he touched me. All on his own.

He booped me!

“You booped me,” I croak, tears forming in my eyes.

Oli blushes deeply and sucks his bottom lip between his teeth. “I suppose I did,” he whispers, nervously brushing his palms over his thighs.

Isowant to make a big deal out of this. I mean, thisisa big deal.

Other than that one time when he ninja-flipped me, he’s never touched me. I mean, not even accidentally. He always keeps a bubble around him, and he just broke through it to give me the tiniest speck of affection. God, I feel like I’m going to explode from holding back. I want to rocket launch directly into his chest and stuff my face in his throat.

Wait.

Wait.

Checking in with myself mentally, I pat down my body with my imagination, making sure it’s all still there. I really do want that. I want to cuddle him and feel his big body next to me—on me.

This is bad. Bad, Jorge.

I wince, catching him withdrawing further into the cushions like he regrets it. Can’t make a big deal about this. I can’t.

Nope. Nope. Nope.

So, I do the only logical thing. I reach over and boop his nose.

He gasps. Full-ongasps. His eyes snap to mine in part shock and part horror. “What was that for?”

“To pull you out of whatever dark hole you went into.”

We stare at each other, static crawling up my arms and making the hairs stand erect. His breaths are shallow, few and far between. “How do you know that? That I go to that place sometimes.”

I shrug, maneuvering to sit on my butt. “Your eyes stop shining.”

His answer is another pretty blush right as my dryer buzzes loudly, shattering the moment.

Oli

Want

Jorge is at Michael’s birthday party.

There’s this irrational fear, knowing he’s there, possibly in the same vicinity ashim.Fuck, I can’t even think of his name, or I start to panic.

Stopping Churro from jumping off my bed, I stuff the fat black rat under my shirt. His little paws scratch at my skin, but it’s welcome. Keeps me present in the moment instead ofthen.

I've been riddled with dread since Jorge told me about the birthday party. We haven’t spent much time together since because he’s been in the recording studio working on a new cover song for his YouTube channel.

I eyeball my phone, hoping for a text that hasn’t come yet. It’s late, too.

Since my rats are nocturnal and I don’t follow a sleeping schedule like most people, I let them get in some free roam time on my bed while I stew in my thoughts.

Did Phoenix go to the party? Is Jorge struggling right now, trying to save face? To keep up this fucking lie? Lenny andDenny—my younger pair of boys—start to scuffle, so I make a high-pitched noise.

“Stop that,” I scold them, using my calf to scoop Lenny between my legs.

When I had to get my car back from the shop on Thursday, I decided to be a coward. I didn’t want to riskhiscar still being there. Couldn’t stomach the possibility of running intohimagain. So I simply asked Manuel to drive it to my studio. He was more than happy not to ask too many questions.

---