Page 38 of Strange Lad

Something is touching my chin. Warm and gentle. A featherlight touch, but I feel it down to my toes.

Slowly cracking open my eyes, I meet Oli’s. His index finger is easing my face higher up. I didn’t even notice I’d tucked it into my chest. There’s a crackle in the air; all the tiny hairs on my arms stand erect while he looks conflicted, maybe even hesitant.

“Me?” he whispers.

I suck in a harsh breath, not sure what to do now that he’s touching me. This is so much more than a boop on the nose. My voice won’t cooperate, so I grunt instead of saying a word.

Those pretty green orbs scan me reverently. “I’ve been attracted to you since I was twelve,” he admits softly and takes his hand away.

I feel the loss of it like a punch to the gut. “Twelve?” I ask, smothering my neediness for the moment.

“Mhm,” he hums, balling up his fists. “Everyone thought you’d end up with Phoenix until Riley came along, anyway.”

Ew, don’t bring up my ex right now. “How come you never said anything?”

His lashes flutter as he shuts his eyes and says, “Because I knew you’d never see me that way.”

“I might have,” I argue. Checking in with myself mentally, I flip through all the weird stuff I was into as a teenager. Yeah, I’m confident there was a good 50% chance I’d have seen him as more than Phoenix’s little brother. “You could have told me, Oli. I’m not…you know I’m notlike that.”

He knows what I mean. I’m not prejudiced or a dick. Even if, for some reason, I wasn’t interested in him that way, I’d have been as gentle as possible with letting him down. I’d have been honest. We could have been friends like this ages ago.

“It wasn’t just that, but it was the biggest hindrance.”

I nod, understanding. Especially with what happened to him. His overdose, whatever traumatic thing he’s going through, and his addiction throughout his adult life. “What do we do now, though? This attraction is mutual.”

“I don’t know, truthfully.”

This issonot like the movies. There’s no embracing or happy tears. No kissing or spontaneous fucking. Consider me mildly disappointed. Despite being confused, we're more distant than ever. This is the best outcome I could have hoped for, so why is he cagey again?

“Is it because of our secret?”

He shakes his head and then nods. “Yes and no.”

“Explain it to me,” I coo, stuffing my hands under my legs so I don’t grab him.

My heart is pounding, and the fluttering in my stomach keeps ramping up in intensity the longer I have to stay still and not show him how attracted I am. Just thinking about touching him inanycapacity has my cock tingling. Pretty soon, I’m going to have a full-on boner.

I want him.

Want.

Need.

Give me.

“For one, I don’t know what you want,” he starts, and before he can take a breath to say the next sentence, I growl, “you.Obviously.”

He blushes while his lips twitch. “But what part of me? You can be attracted to someone and have it remain platonic.” I scoff. “And another thing, I just…well. I don’t think I can do anything about it, Jorge. It’s complicated.”

This coyness isn’t lost on me. Oli’s fishing for fucking answers. “Let me put it bluntly,” I say, and my hands fly through the air while I talk. “I want you,” I point at him, “inanycapacity. Obviously, I’d be more than willing to doeverything, but I get it if you don’t want that. You set the pace, and I’ll keep up.”

His eyes flick to mine in shock. “You’d do that?”

“Of course. Have you met me?” I puff out my flat chest, and he huffs a laugh.

“But you’re so…” He gestures at me.

“Sexy? Devastatingly handsome?” I tease, and he rolls his eyes.

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