Page 77 of Taking the Heat

Everybody in the room gasped and I felt the heat of nineteen stares bake into me. The scene had been cut and stitched together beautifully. If I hadn’t been there, I wouldn’t have known it didn’t happen that way either.

Receding into myself, I hugged my arms to my chest and lowered my head. I heard Miles talking from a distance, but the words didn’t reach my brain. People began to clear out of the bungalow and I let them go.

Finally, I looked up. Besides the ever-present Greg, the only person left was Chris.

‘Are we gonna yell?’ I asked in a small voice.

‘No,’ said Chris, sounding flat and empty. It was worse than if he screamed; he sounded like he’d given up.

‘That wasn’t how it went down,’ I said, the words feeble.

‘I’m sure.’

‘Well, you’re rich.’

‘I am.’

‘What happened to “no more secrets”?’ Even though I was too tired and drained to feel much of anything, the hurt at his lack of trust poured in through my cracked edges.

He sighed. ‘We were talking about you, not me.’

‘Well, that’s not a very open relationship.’

Chris finally sparked up a little. ‘Open? You want open? Fine. Let’s be open. See Henry if you want.’

‘Wait, that’s not what I mean—’

‘And I’ll see Aanya.’

His cavalier manner made me determined not to react. ‘Fine. Sounds good.’

Sadly, his eyes bored into me. ‘Tara … do you want me to let you go? I know I pushed you today, didn’t I? Maybe we are moving too fast.’ He spoke almost to himself. ‘We probably need to have some time apart. Is that what you want? ‘

Frustrated, I squirmed in my chair. ‘I don’t know anymore, Chris. Why is it always so hard between us? Every time I think we’re fine, something else comes along. I can’t seem to go a day without crying over you. Shouldn’t love be easier?’

Chris didn’t answer, and I read volumes in his silence. I stood up and walked away, not looking back.

***

Hours later, I sat on my balcony, staring out over the darkened jungle and moonlit ocean. I hadn’t even tried crawling into bed; I knew that I’d simply lie awake, twisting in my sheets, reliving myself kissing Henry on the screen.

Alone, but not alone. ‘Psst … are you gonna cry? You know, you still owe me one.’ Greg lurked behind me in the bedroom, filming my contemplations.

‘No. I’m beyond tears.’

‘Do you want me to play some sad music? Or I can call for an onion?’

‘Greg, I let you stay because I was lonely and you’re surprisingly good company, for a soulless cog in this horrible game. Don’t piss me off.’

He clicked off the camera. ‘Soulless cog? I’ll have you know, I’m being listed for a credit as a fourth AD.’

‘Go to bed, Greg.’

Yawning, he said, ‘You’re probably right. It’s almost midnight and tomorrow’s challenge is a doozy.’

‘What time is it?’ I said, bolting up in my chair.

‘I don’t know …’ He studied his watch, tilting it in the dim light. ‘Seven, six minutes to midnight? Or maybe less, my watch is fast. Or is it slow …?’

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