Page 76 of Storm Warning

“Okay.” And there she was in his space again, but he could tell that her thoughts had moved away from whatever the oven timer had interrupted between them.

“I didn’t plan to stay so long at Cedar Trails. I mean, why would I want to stay there when I had planned to travel the world and write a travel blog? But I didn’t have unlimited funds, so I’d need to do it on the cheap,” she said. “Obviously I got caught up in my life at the lodge. I pretended it was myreallife.”

“It was your real life. It is your life. The here and now. This present moment is your life. Not the past or some future dream that may or may not come true. It doesn’t matter that circumstances seemed to bring you here, that’s part of it. Haven’t you heard the old saying that life is what happens when you’re busy making plans?”

Looking at him, she ducked her chin. “Wise words from someone so young.”

She made him laugh with that one. He hadn’t laughed in a long time. “I don’t know whether to be hurt because you didn’t think I could say the wordenraptured, and now you act like I don’t ever say anything that comes across as wisdom.”

“It was meant to be a compliment.” She sent him a soft smile.

He didn’t let his gaze linger on her lips but started cutting up the lasagna. “I’m hungry, and I’m not waiting any longer.”

She left his side and rushed back to grab the plates from the table. “We can just plate it here. It’s easier.”

Using two spatulas, he tried to get a square piece onto each plate, but the layers didn’t remain completely intact. “Doesn’t matter. It tastes the same.”

“Thanks for making it.”

They took their plates back to the table and dug in and ate in silence for a few moments.

“You said you missed the lodge,” he said. “You can’t wait to get back, can you?”

“I miss the breeze.”

“You mean the wind. There’s rarely anything breezy on the Pacific Northwest coast.”

She smiled. “Okay, I miss the wind. And I love the storms, as long as I don’t have to be standing out in them or hidingfrom a villain, but I fell in love. I guess I sort of lost myself there.”

“Or ... maybe you found yourself.”

After she finished a bite, she angled her head as if thinking. “Maybe.”

Yeah, Hawk had a feeling that Cedar Trails Lodge might be her permanent home. She’d fit in and, before everything had hit, was in a good place.

“But then again, I was pretending that I didn’t have this dark secret chasing me, closing in on me.” Her shoulders dropped. “Honestly, I hoped it would go away silently. I should have done more to find answers before things got out of hand.”

“You were doing what your doctor advised. Don’t beat yourself up.” He could go down that dark and lonely road too, and he did often, wondering what he could have done differently to prevent his brother from traveling this path that led nowhere good. But he had to accept that he had no control over his brother, over others. No control over their decisions.

“Listen to me, whining about my life. Hawk...” She slid her hand across the table as if she would press it over his, but she just left it there. Just reaching out from her heart? “Your brother. I’m so sorry this is happening.”

“After everything Cole has put you through, you can say this?”

“Yes. You didn’t make the decision for him. He isn’t ... you. And I can’t imagine how hard it must be.”

I believe you.He saw so much compassion in her expression, his heart melted, but with the thaw he felt so much more anguish over his brother. He cared deeply, grieved so long, that he had to build up a wall to protect himself. Anyone would. If he was going to make it through, he needed to keep that wall up, so he pressed his hand overhers, felt the warmth there, the softness of her skin. He ignored the sudden longing that coursed through him. The need to be close to someone and build a life. He pulled his hand away and then stood, grabbed their plates, and moved to wash them in the sink. He had to focus on what to do next.

He finished washing the dishes while Remi sauntered around in the living room. He didn’t want to look at her and see disappointment again or that he’d hurt her. It seemed unreasonable that he was even thinking along these lines, under the circumstances.

He dried the two dishes and the utensils and put them away. Wiped down the counter. Frowned at the leftover lasagna. Would they stay here long enough to finish it off? He covered it and stuck it in the fridge. Then headed to face Remi in the living room.

She’d taken a corner of the sofa, her legs propped up and her chin on her arm.

“Look, we’ll wrap this up as quickly as possible. Talk to John in the hospital. And if all goes well, you can go back to the lodge and be free of the past.”

“I’d love that. I really would. But I can’t shake the feeling it won’t be that easy.”

His fears exactly. But he couldn’t let that distract him. At the opposite end of the sofa, Hawk sat on the edge. “It’s time to figure things out.”