Page 25 of Shattered and Saved

“What, Koen?!” I finally snapped, defensive as he put me on the spot. “It’s not like you didn’t know.” I stepped closer, the air bristling as our stares clashed, sharp and unyielding. We both held our heads high, alpha against alpha. “When I brought you here, I told you the truth. All of it. Including what happens to those who might expose us.”

He pursed his lips, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Shaking his head, he said, “You can’t keep killing wolves left and right. It’s not right.”

“Why not?” I squinted my eyes at him, angry at how he would question my actions as a leader. “It’s what I’ve done since I took over Azure Smoke. It’s what my uncle did before me. What my parents used to do until they were slain after havingtheir identities exposed. I won’t let any more of mine be taken by them!”

“Because I’m one ofthem, Avril!” he roared, hurt in his voice, making me wince. As my shoulders slouched, he took a bold step forward, uncertainty darkening his eyes. “Can’t you see it? Oliver has a point. What’s the difference between me and any other regular werewolf?”

I forced my eyes shut, letting out a defeated breath. Realizing he had every right to be mad, I laid my weapons down. When I looked at him again, I reached for his face, but he pulled back, evading my touch. My heart throbbed painfully at the rejection. I parted my lips, desperate to explain why he mattered more to me than anyone else, but no words came. I had nothing to offer. My silence only fueled his doubts, and he was quick to voice them.

“If you get bored of me, will you dispose of me, too?” he accused, hitting me like a knife to the heart. “Will you kill me if I ever become aliabilityto you, Avril?”

“Of course not!” I tried to defend, hurt heavy in my eyes. “I could have left you to die, like you told me to. But I didn’t. I sacrificed everything to bring you here, where I knew you’d be safe.”

“And you made it clear that I can’t leave,” he barked back immediately. “What happens if I decide I don’t want to be your prisoner anymore?”

The disappointment in his glare chilled me to the bone. It reminded me of the day I went after him. Back then, he’d pushed me away, refusing to hear what I had to say. My actions had hurt him deeply. I couldn’t find the words then, just as I couldn’t find them now.

Suddenly, the wonderful night we’d shared felt like a distant dream. I thought we were finally starting to see eye to eye, but maybe I was wrong. Maybe I’d kept love at arm’s length for so long that I no longer knew how to let it in.

Maybe Koen and I were fated never to work out, our worlds too different to ever truly connect.

Still, I tried, “Koen, please…”

“Stop, Avril.” He heaved a heavy sigh, massaging his temples, his tiredness showing. “I need some air.”

“Wait-” I went after him, but just as he opened the door, he revealed my beta, gamma and delta standing outside.

As their gazes collided, I was certain they felt the tension hanging in the air. Koen lifted his chin, pretending nothing was amiss as he walked past my friends. My eyes stayed on him until he disappeared down the hall. Kea urged me to follow, to try and fix things between us. But I had responsibilities. I couldn’t abandon my team to chase after him at such a delicate moment.

I forced myself to set aside the conflict with Koen and adopted a neutral expression, masking my emotions. Before Theo and Elijah, who clearly sensed something was off, could ask any questions, I ushered them inside and took my seat. We had an urgent matter to discuss, and I couldn’t afford to let my personal issues distract me from the situation with the fledgling.

We needed to understand what was happening before it spiraled into a larger problem.

16

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A V R I L

“How’s Oliver?”I asked as soon as my friends settled in their seats across from my desk.

While I was worried about our new member’s strange outburst, there was another reason for my urgency. I needed a distraction - anything to take my mind off my argument with Koen. It flooded my thoughts, even affecting Kea, who wouldn’t stop pacing in distress inside my head.

“Better,” Rhea began, though her expression hinted that her report wasn’t as positive as she’d hoped. “We took him to his cottage and waited for him to come back to his senses. When he woke up, he seemed… confused.”

Seeing my brows furrow, Theo added, “He said he couldn’t fully remember what happened. From what he told us, his memory was blurry. He remembered feeling angry, but he didn’t know why.”

“His amnesia could’ve been caused by the silver,” Elijah continued, “but with the small dosage we used, it’s unlikely. He was under for no more than five minutes.”

“Did it sound like he could be lying?” I offered.

“I doubt it,” Rhea answered. She had great sense for reading other people’s auras, alway attentive to the smallest signs they could give away through body language, so I trusted herjudgment. “Either he’s an awfully good liar, or he’s truly just as confused as we are about his sudden change in behavior.”

I took a moment to analyze what little information they had provided so far. It still didn’t make a lot of sense. The only thing I could think of was that perhaps it was a condition he could have. It wasn’t uncommon for wolf shifters to have anger management issues that could result in violent explosions such as the one we’d witnessed.

“Did he mention ever experiencing similar episodes before?” I mused.

“No. He appeared very scared and ashamed it happened, which leads me to believe it was a first for him,” Theo told me. The worry in his eyes only intensified my own. “To me, it seems almost like he blacked out and his wolf took over, but what got him so riled up, I couldn’t figure out.”

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