Page 57 of Devil's Deal

“I suck. I’m the worst,” I babbled. “I didn’t deserve Mac, and I don’t deserve you.”

Romeo only held me tighter, whispering reassurances in my ear. I cried harder, snot running from my nose, gagging around the thickness coating my throat. Now that the dam had broken, I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to stop. I wasn’t sure I deserved to.

I had no idea how long we’d been in the shower. The water no longer ran hot but was cool on my skin, bringing me back to the here and now. Romeo’s arms, still locked around me, held me securely, keeping me from falling and comforting me. Rubbing my cheek against his hairy chest, I sniffed. “Sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for, sweet boy. I have a feeling that was a long time coming.”

I couldn’t disagree with that, but the flood of emotion had left me wrung out. “I guess we should get out of here now.”

Romeo’s husky chuckle bounced around the small space. “That may be for the best. It’s only going to get colder.”

He turned me under the spray, rinsing me one last time. I cupped my hands, filled them with water, and cleaned the remnants of tears and snot off my face. Once we were finished, he patted me dry and then secured the towel around my waist. Quickly, he did the same to himself, led me to the couch, and pulled me down onto his lap.

I snorted. “I’m too big for this, Daddy.”

Trailing his fingers up and down my spine, he smiled softly. “You’re just right for me.” Then he laughed.

Curious, I asked, “What’s so funny?”

“I was just thinking about all the years I spent at Daddy–boy weekends seeking out the cutest, smallest guys I could find. That always felt like enough. I guess, in a way, it was.”

Still in my feels, I tensed. Was my larger size a problem for him? Was I not his ideal boy? Romeo squeezed me around the waist, then poked at the marks he’d left on my shoulder, the bottom of my neck, my pec, and right next to my belly button.

“Don’t go thinking I’m saying there’s anything wrong with you, boy. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. I thought they were enough because no matter how much I enjoyed their company, I easily went back to the brutal man I was raised to be after those weekends.” He shook his head. “But that wasn’t even a possibility with you. You, my quirky boy”—he bopped the end of my nose—“got under my skin immediately. If I’m honest, I think I would’ve found a reason to stay in Takoda even if you hadn’t been having troubles.”

Tangling my fingers in his silver and black chest hair, I leaned my head on his shoulder and stared up at him. “You never really explained why you were in town.”

His gaze searched my face. “I’ll tell you, but we’re still going to talk about what happened. I know the blueprints made you feel some kind of way, but what happened in the bathroom felt like more.”

Moisture clouded my vision, and I sniffed. “It was, and I’ll tell you, but give me a few minutes. Talk to me first. I know you left information out when we’ve talked about it before.”

“I’m going to hold you to that. And I may have left a few important details out. The boy I met, Chip, the weekend I became friends with Omar, was the sweetest thing. Timid, scared of his own shadow, but he had a heart of gold. Unfortunately, I was coming off a bad job. I disliked my employer even more than the person I was contracted to take out. It ate at me. That’s the only excuse I have for not being in full Daddy mode when I got to the conference.

“Anyway, Chip was so silent, damn near mute. He hadn’t really drawn any of the other men’s attention, or mine for that matter, because it was like he had no personality. But Omar had met a boy, his name’s Nigel, and Nigel was keeping Chip close. He totally befriended him and gave up on alone time with Omar to take Chip with them and make sure he wasn’t left out. Let me tell you, without trying to impress anyone, but letting go and hanging with Nigel…I saw a different side of Chip.

“It made me feel like a real dick. Part of my everyday life is trusting my gut, following my intuition, but I was so in my head I almost missed out on this great guy. Like you, he was a little quirky, but he was bright, kind, smart…” He shook his head.

“Are you saying I’m not bright, kind, and smart?” I teased.

He pinched my side. “Brat. I’m not saying that at all. Anyway, we had a great weekend, and for the first time, I felt bad that I had to leave a boy behind. Even knowing we wouldn’t have lasted forever, the devastation on his face as we said goodbye after seeing Omar and Nigel make a love match that had them rearranging their lives…” He huffed. “It didn’t matter. I would’ve never brought him into this world.”

“So you’ve told me some of that. Now tell me what you left out,” I prodded.

“Apparently, our time together gave Chip the confidence to put himself out there. He ended up in a situation where his boss found out his preferences and made a play for him. It got bad,” he finished darkly. “Omar, Nigel, and a man who would later become Chip’s forever Daddy, rescued him.”

“And let me guess, you returned later to take out the trash.”

Romeo nodded, frowning. “Does that bother you?”

“As a matter of fact, it doesn’t. What’s concerning, however, is the turn my thoughts are taking. I spoke with Charity today, and she told me how she ended up out on the streets. Daddy, I’m telling you, my immediate reaction was wanting you to go take her parents out.”

His eyes narrowed. “Tell me.”

So I did. I told him everything about Charity, my concerns for Huey’s girlfriend and child, and all the other thoughts that had swirled through my head while he’d held me together in the shower. He listened patiently, only asking questions here and there. I talked until my voice grew hoarse, unloading all the pain.

By the time I was done, a few more tears had slipped free. Using the side of his thumb, Romeo wiped them from my cheeks. “Well, I think what you’re doing for Charity is amazing. I’m happy that she’s going to be around. Since I met you, it seems that I’m collecting people to be protective of, too.”

“Like who?” I asked, curious.

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