Page 89 of Colt

Colt chuckled ruefully as he got to his feet and slowly walked toward me. “I dunno what’s got into me, Freya. I feel so fuckin’ antsy all the time. I’ve got your dad on my back wantin’ me to deal with the club business I missed when I was in Denver, and on top of that, he won’t leave me the fuck alone.” He took my hand, brought it to his mouth, and gently kissed my knuckles, sincerity shining in his beautiful eyes.

My heart fluttered.

I opened my mouth, about to automatically let him off the hook, but the memory of the dismissiveness in his tone stopped me.

It wasn’t the first time he’d lashed out and hurt me, and what worried me was the dawning knowledge that there was a pattern to Colt’s attitude. Every time he turned on me, he apologized and said he’d work on it, but he was obviously just paying me lip service.

I pulled my hand away from his, steeled my spine, and tilted my chin proudly.

His hands came up and framed my face. “Fuckin’ hate it when you pull away from me, Freya. And what really fucks me up is that the reason you do it is ‘cause I’ve fuckin’ pushed ya. I’ve been single a long time, baby. All I’ve done for twelve years is please myself. I’m still gettin’ used to thinking of me as an us. Add on the crippling guilt I feel every time your dad so much as looks at me, and I feel like a cornered animal. Maybe I need more time to adjust. A lot’s happened, and it’s all gone at light speed.”

My throat thickened. “Do you want to take a step back?” The thought of us pulling away from each other made me feel sick, but if it was affecting him to the point where he was a dick to me, it was for the best.

“No.” He shook his head vehemently. “That’s the last thing I want. I need you, Freya. You’re the only one who keeps my head straight half the time. I just need you to bear with me while I adjust and work things out. It won’t happen overnight, but when it concerns us, I promise I'll do better.”

The sincerity in his oath warmed my skin. Honesty flashed behind his expressive blue eyes. I could tell he meant every word from the steely tone of his voice.

Colt’s blond hair, good looks and his rugged edge made my heart race whenever we were in each other’s vicinity. I’d been drawn to him since I was a girl and understood he was a complicated man. I was there for the taking, ready and waiting to start our life together, but a part of me wondered if he was still catching up.

“Don’t do it again,” I murmured, holding his gaze. “I won’t let anyone treat me like shit, Colt. You included.”

He smiled softly, then leaned forward and kissed me gently on my lips.

Shivers ran through every inch of my body, but I still pulled away. I’d forgiven, but I hadn’t forgotten. The fact he kept doing this shit to me was something I still had to think hard about. I wasn’t the girl who’d put up with it. Constantly walking on eggshells wasn’t my idea of a loving relationship.

“I'll do my best to get to the gallery,” he told me quietly, resting his forehead against mine. “Stay there tonight. Wait for me.”

I nodded, eyes flitting over every millimeter of the face I’d adored for so long. I’d wait forever for my man, but after our argument, he didn’t need to know that.

Colt cursed under his breath as his cell phone buzzed in his pocket. He fished it out before looking at the screen and rolling his eyes. “I gotta go. Sorry, baby. Your pa’s drivin’ me batty.” He slipped his phone away again and cupped my jaw. “There’re some bags in the bottom of your closet. Got ‘em for ya in Denver. My way of tryin’ to show you how much I care.” Our eyes locked. “And I do care. I feel everythin’ for you, baby.”

My insides melted at his words.

This was why I loved him. Colt may have been one percent asshole, but the other ninety-nine percent was perfect. The way he looked, thought, moved, and spoke did it for me.

The air swirling around us felt alive. Silence hung thick and heavy until Colt’s eyes softened. Clearing his throat, he rasped, “I gotta go.”

“Okay.” I nodded in agreement, not trusting myself to say anything more.

Colt gave me one last look before turning and heading towards the door.

As he walked away, I couldn’t help asking myself if we’d ever find a way to make things work, or whether we were just two people who were meant for each other but just weren’t destined to be together.

For the first time since we’d gotten together, doubt circled like a noose around my neck, and every day, it pulled tighter and tighter. It wasn’t that I didn’t love Colt; I did, heart and soul. I even believed he loved me in his own way.

But I couldn’t ignore the question whispering through my mind. A question that made my stomach clench with pain.

Is love enough?

“Nice boots,” Cara called out enviously from the couches when I strutted out to the bar a half-hour later. “That bag’s hot as fuck too,” she added, peering at the black tote slung over my shoulder. “John’s gonna shit his shorts when he sees your credit card bill.”

“Colt bought them for me.” I looked around to check nobody was listening before looking down and almost preening at my sexy new footwear. “They’re a ‘sorry I was an asshole’ apology.”

She whistled through her teeth. “I’ll need to lay some hints for Xander. His idea of an apology is offering me a drag of his smoke after a quick fuck.”

I giggled and grimaced at the same time. “That was funny as hell, but also way too much fucking information, Cara. He’s my brother. There are some things I don’t need to know.”

“Fair enough.” She waggled her eyebrows suggestively. “But I wanna know everything that happens between you and Colt, including width and girth. Mama needs to live her life vicariously through you now she’s an ol’ lady again with a kid who doesn’t know what sleep is.” She glanced over the rest of my outfit. “Are you going out?”

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