Page 3 of Beginnings

If I thought my face was hot before, it was blazing now. I was speechless. He might sense I was far more innocent than I pretended, but that didn’t mean I was some shrinking violet, or that he knew me as well as he thought anymore. I didn’t cower from anyone or anything—especially him. I survived from age six on the streets of London until Rawson took me in at twelve. And I did that by being smart, learning how to fight, and yeah, I’ve killed more than once, too. I also learned very early on never to show fear or the human and supernatural predators that lurked in the shadows would pounce. And Connor was a predator; a top-of-the-food-chain predator. Instead of cowering as he called me out, I straightened my spine, tilted my chin up, curled my upper lip and held his eyes.

The air pulsed around me, causing goosebumps to burst all over my bare skin. A wonderful spicy scent drifted up my nose and I inhaled, deeply. Gods, what was that? My heart raced and my belly clenched. A sudden wave of warmth, pooled at the apex of my thighs. For just a moment, as my wolf strained to break free, I forgot we weren’t alone.

Connor tilted his head, and his eyes narrowed, his fingers tightening into fists as he swallowed hard.

A loud cough from behind made me jump, breaking the spell between us. I blinked rapidly. What the hell had just happened? At eighteen years old, I knew I was near what everyone else thought was my first shift—my Primis, but in truth, my first shift had come soon after my parents had been killed. I had done it alone, in the dark, screaming—and no matter how much my wolf wanted freedom, I sure as hell wasn’t letting her out. Not again. At least, not yet.

Connor’s muscles were tense as he watched me, the veins in his neck popping despite his relaxed posture against the door frame. Rawson coughed again, muttering something under his breath. All I could concentrate on was the darkness in Connor’s eyes as it faded into a sea of blue until only obsidian flecks remained. Even when his eyes were that beautiful azure colour again, Connor’s face remained dark, his jaw clenched.

The air between us burned with—something. I dropped my gaze, confusion halting my smart mouth. I had no idea what had just passed between us. For a few seconds, I just gathered my composure, feeling his gaze burn into me. Taking a breath, I plastered a scowl on my face, looked up—and did a double take.

Connor’s full lips were pulled back in a grin, that self-assurance and cockiness back in place. “Like I said, Firecracker, a handful.”

Emotions tumbled through me. Part of me wanted to deck him, part of me wanted to kiss him. Although, if he kept on laughing at me, I was going to kick him squarely in his junk. My gaze dropped to that part of his anatomy of their own accord. My body heated, like someone had lit a fire in my blood. What would it be like to touch him; to have him touch me, his fingers stroking... My cheeks flamed. Oh, Christ! I shouldn’t be thinking about Connor like this! He was way out of my league, and way too experienced to bother with someone like me. Besides, I knew better than to trust him. He’d left me once, he’d leave me again.

His gaze met mine, and his pupils darkened again like someone had dropped ink into them. His intense, burning attention travelled down my sweat coated body, right over my cropped top and gym leggings which didn’t hide much of my skinny frame. A low growl came from his throat. My blood heated at the pure desire in that sound. It set my mind ablaze, leaving my body achy and shaking, and my throat parched. I need to touch him. He’s the only one who can stop this thirst, this ache... I swayed towards him, until a large, firm hand on my shoulder stopped me.

“Connor, that’s enough!” Rawson snarled viciously, glaring at Connor. Connor stopped that deep resonant growl, and forced his attention away from me. He inhaled deeply, exhaled slowly, and then shrugged like it was no big deal.

Rawson shook his head, his hand dropping from my shoulder. With a grim look, he turned and stalked over to the training room cupboard, stuffing the fighting pads in a canvas sack so they could be stored away.

“Em! Hit the shower!” he yelled, his voice muffled from inside the cupboard. “I need to talk to Connor, alone.”

I shrugged in acknowledgement. “Fine by me.” I was still unsettled by the heady scent that lingered in my nostrils. I barged past Connor, heat from his arm searing my skin. My breath caught in my throat. That spicy scent hit me again and the urge to stop and touch him, to run my fingers over those arms to see if they felt as good as they looked, was almost overwhelming. My wolf whined, sniffing the air and pushing against my skin. Hands fisted, I clenched my jaw, then deliberately turned my head away and walked past him.

I paused on the stairs to try and regain some steadiness in my legs. “What the fuck was that?” I overheard Rawson snap just as the training room door slammed shut.

* * *

“Argh!”I threw myself on my bed, covering my eyes with both of my forearms. Blood oozed into my mouth. Damn! I rolled my eyes. I’d bitten my bottom lip while stomping back to my room. Slapping my palms on my bed, my hand brushed a soft pink bunny that Lyss had bought me years ago. I smiled. Lyss was so sweet. When I first arrived in her home, and she said she wanted me to have some nice ‘girly’ things, I hated the thought of anyone buying me anything. It would leave me feeling indebted, and back then, I was determined I was going to run away before these people got the chance to hurt me or let me down. Secretly, I loved that someone cared enough to buy me a pink rabbit, even if it was hideous. It was now one of my favourite possessions. I picked it up and held it above me, looking into its shiny blue eyes. “He’s such a dick.”

“He won’t answer,” said an amused voice from my doorway.

I looked at Lyss and rolled my eyes. “I know.”

She grinned. “But I agree with you.”

I set Mr Bunny down onto the bed at my side. “You do?”

Lyss walked across my carpet, pink of course, and lowered herself to sit elegantly on my bed. I hid a scowl, envying her walk. It really wasn’t fair, I decided, also noticing how tight her shirt was across her generous breasts. Some women had everything going for them. Lyss was tall and pretty, with full lips that looked like she’d been kissing Rawson for hours, which she probably had...ew! Where did that come from? She had cat-like green eyes and a figure that had curves and dips most women would sell their souls to possess.

“Of course. The bunny’s always been a dick.” She grinned at me and winked.

I snorted a laugh. “Mr Bunny’s not the problem.”

“I know, sweetness.” She laid down beside me. Her blonde curly hair spilled over the bed and her delicate perfume tickled my nose. It was nice—a smell that I now equated with safety.

I ignored the ‘sweetness’ label. We both knew I was as far from sweet as you could get.

“Remember, Connor has been with us since he was a teenager, only a few years older than you were, and he’s always been a handful. It was clear early on that he was a powerful alpha, and that he was almost too old to learn control. I even tried to persuade Cain to send him to the bureau for assessment.”

I swallowed hard. An assessment by the SBI meant they would decide if a shifter was too dangerous to live in society—if they failed the assessment they were terminated.

“But my man didn’t want to give up on him.” Lyss smiled and cocked her head. “I’m glad he didn’t. With Cain’s help, Connor’s managed to beat his anger issues, and controls his demons—most of the time. I know he’s arrogant, but it’s because he can be; he’s good looking, successful, powerful, has a body to die for and can handle himself in almost any given situation. That, along with a heavy dose of self-confidence and Prime Alpha vibes is a heady combination for any girl whose hormones are awake and buzzing. But...yeah, he knows it and that makes him a bit of a dick. One day, maybe he’ll get his heart broken and realise you can’t treat people like shit—well, women anyway.” She shrugged. “Or he’ll meet someone who can see beyond that alpha male bullshit to the scared little boy, the one who fights attachments, who’s reluctant to trust; remember, he’s been abandoned in the past...”

I sighed and sat up. Rubbing my face, I wondered if Lyss knew that, with those last words, she was describing me. “I don’t care.” Connor wouldn’t ever let anyone that close—certainly not me.

“Sure you don’t.” Lyss cocked a brow. “But you are already beautiful, far more than you realise. And dicks like him will be chasing you wherever you go. You’ll be able to have your pick of dicks.”

“Oh good gods!” I exclaimed, shaking my head. “I can’t believe you just said that…dicks will be chasing me? That’s just so wrong! I really don’t want to be chased by dicks...like ever…” I pretended to shudder. “Great. Now I have an image of big phallus thingies chasing me up the street! Ah! It’s going to give me nightmares, and it’s your fault!” I laughed and shuddered while pushing away the sudden image of Connor’s gaze running over my body.

Lyss fell into a fit of giggles. “Oh, your face! I knew that would cheer you up.”

I held my palms up in surrender. “Yeah, well it worked. Consider me cheered up. You can go now. I’m going to hit the shower and try not to have nightmares about dicks chasing me.” And, although I was trying for disgust, I giggled, again. It was true, Lyss always did manage to cheer me up, no matter what happened in my day.

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