Page 3 of Remember, Love

2

Two Months Later…

Beth

“Arch your back a little more. Look up. No, to the left.” I follow Daniel’s commands, keeping my face relaxed as he snaps photo after photo. The snow machine blows chill air and white flakes over my bare skin. Goosebumps pop up over my arms and I suppress a shiver.

Sometimes I think modeling is all about the meeting of absurdity and fashion. Point in fact, today I’m wearing a sequin bikini in a blizzard. With Sherpa boots and a furry hat. At least there’s the furry hat. I fight back a snort.

Daniel’s face appears from behind his camera. “Take a break,” he sighs.

I hop down from my perch on top of the sparkly plastic igloo.

“Is it wrong that all I want is a pumpkin spice latte and a bag of marshmallows? Cause ya know, it’s May. But this snow…” I pull a funny face and scrunch up my nose at Daniel.

He sighs and shakes his head. “We’ve got to tear down the set in less than an hour.”

“I know. I’m sorry.” I smile apologetically. Daniel was the photographer that “discovered” me four years ago. He’s worked with me on shoots for Vogue, Elle, Glamour, and more.

At eighteen, the fashion industry loved my “innocent fresh looks and soulful eyes.” They had no clue that the look in my eyes came from the heartache of losing my soulmate. I touch my chest, feel my heart beat. I lost him exactly five years ago today. And ever since, I’ve been standing in front of a camera, wishing it were him behind it.

“You look tired. And pale.” Daniel frowns at the amount of concealer under my eyes. “It’s not like you to be distracted during a shoot.”

I plaster on my famous cover model smile. “I’m fine. I’m ready. Besides, it’s not every day I get to hang out on top of an igloo that’s on top of a raft in a swimming pool that’s on top of a skyscraper.”

I scrunch my nose. He would have laughed so hard at the absurdity of this shoot. We would have rolled around on the ground in fits over it, then probably ended up naked and rolling around in other ways.

I sit still as hair and makeup does a few retouches and costuming re-tapes the swimsuit. I climb back up to the top of mount igloo. It’s time I acknowledged to myself that I’m done with modeling. This is going to be my last shoot. I need to move on.

It’s time that I stop dwelling on the past. No matter how much I want to stay there. I turn to the camera as the shoot starts up again.

“Perfect,” coaxes Daniel, “keep that faraway look.”

The snow machine blows over me and I tilt my neck back staring at the flakes as they fall.

“Yes. There.”

I sigh. Almost done.

“Got it.” Daniel claps his hands and the staff immediately starts the tear down and clean up.

I hop down from the igloo and grab a robe. “Thanks for everything.” I clear my throat and watch as Daniel flips through the photos on the screen.

He turns to me. “So, this is good-bye?”

I’m not surprised that he already knows. A great photographer knows how to read his models. And Daniel is one of the best. “Yeah, I think it is. I need to move on.”

“So, you’re finally over whoever broke your heart?”

I step back, somewhat shocked. I’ve never talked with anyone about my past.

My lips wobble. “No.” I don’t elaborate. Logan isn’t someone you get over, and I’m still not truly, absolutely convinced he’s really gone. Sure, we both knew that what he did was risky. Being Force Recon for the Marines is dangerous. I knew that. But when his parents told me that he’d been killed on a mission…I cracked.

“I didn’t think you were,” Daniel says. “Sometimes you never get over them.”

I nod. It’s like I was made of glass, and when they said Logan died, I shattered. I put myself back together, but there were bits missing, and ugly jagged edges, and sharp points.

“Thanks for everything,” I tell Daniel. “You helped me more than you’ll ever know.”

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