Page 18 of Tough Love

She holds out a hand for Sergeant to sniff. He nudges her hand, and I lead him to the round yard, Addy following at my side. Her hands shift from her pockets to across her neck to her pockets again. When we reach the gate to the round yard, she darts forward and opens it.

I walk Sergeant through and come to a stop in the center of the yard. The sun has reached its apex by the time I double-check the girth and walk the gelding in a few circles. Addy stands by the gate, stiff. Her usual sunshine is clouded by a storm, visible in her eyes.

I hang the reins over Sergeant’s neck and walk back to the gate where she stands. Her cheeks are pink in the heat of midday. I take off my hat and plop it on her head. “Can’t have you getting burnt,” I say, my voice gravel.

“I don’t know if I can.” Her eyes are glued to Sergeant.

“I’m right here; take your time. Even if you only mount and dismount. That’s okay. Sergeant isn’t going anywhere. He has all day.”

She nods, but her pulse thunders in her neck. Her breaths have turned shallow.

Dammit.

All I want to do right now is fold her into me. To take away the fear and that desperate look on her face that is tearing at my heart. Instead, I clear my throat and walk back to Sergeant and gesture for her to follow.

She takes tentative steps to where we stand, eyes studying the gelding as if hunting for any sign of danger. I extend an arm, ushering her closer. She steps into my space by my side, as if I am all of a sudden safer than the horse in front of her. I’m not too sure about that.

She drags her gaze from Sergeant and finds mine. “You will be right here? You won’t step away?”

“Right here, Howard. Not going anywhere.”

She blows out a low, shaky breath. And nods.

I resist the urge to tell her how to mount. She knows what to do. Sergeant nickers, and she pauses. Her hand waves to the side, hunting. I grab her hand, and she forces a wobbly smile. A stone lodges in my throat. I push air in and out of my lungs. Sergeant shifts on his feet, resting a back leg. Bored already. Good man.

She releases my hand and takes the reins and a handful of his mane.

So far, so good.

“You’re okay. Nice work.”

She hovers from foot to foot and her eyes close. As if she is hyping herself up to mount the gelding. As if being on a horse is akin to the worst experience on the planet.Fuck, Addy. What the hell happened to you?

The breeze rustles through my hair, and she turns back, studying my face. Maybe gauging whether she really trusts me to do this.

But when she lifts her foot and slides it into the stirrup, I move forward, ready to catch her if she bails. She grabs the back of the saddle with her other hand and goes to push up into the saddle. But her body trembles, and she shakes her head violently. “No,” she chokes.

She is out of the stirrup and backing away before Sergeant even knows she’s gone.

“I’m sorry, Hudson. I can’t do this.”

Her face breaks as she turns and shoves through the gate with a breathy moan.

Fuck.

Chapter Six

ADDY

Ican’t do it. And I’m going to lose my job.

Sliding down the wall of the barn beside Hudson’s truck, I shove my head in my hands. Knees up. Body shaking. I can’t even mount. Why did I think I could do this? A strangled groan spills into my hands. Harry is going to be disappointed. And then it hits me—is he going to be angry at Hudson, too? He did assign this job to his son. And from what I gather, he is not used to being let down.

A wet snout hits my arm. I lift my head to find Charlie. I put my legs down and he makes himself at home on my lap. He nuzzles into my lap, and I rub his head and face. “I bet you’re not scared of anything, little man.”

“Oh, he is. His food bowl being empty.”

I look up to find Hudson’s worried face. His blue eyes are narrowed, his hair is messed up, and I remember I still have his hat on. I pull it off and hold it up to him. But he shakes his head. “You still need it, Howard.”

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