He chuckles.
“Tell me about your new place. The ranch must be something?”
“Yeah, it’s something. Harry thinks so, at least.”
“You’re not happy with it?”
He huffs a strangled breath and plucks at the grass at his seat. I can barely see his face under the cap.
“Maybe. I just . . .”
“It’s not what you wanted?”
He stares at me now, eyes narrowed, mouth a thin line. “I don’t know what I want. That’s the problem. Everyone is moving forward, or already knows. Look at you. Ruby Robbins, career woman. And I can’t even make the first step. I can’t even decide.”
The expression on his face and the defeat in his voice make my heart crack. Like he feels like a failure at the ripe old age of twenty-eight, because what he has isn’t what he wants.
“Well, what are your options?”
“Ranching. Ranching, or . . . ranching.”
“Reed,” I say breathily.
“I’m serious, Rubes. Harry doesn’t take no for an answer. And he’s handed me millions in land and equipment. I can’t walk away now. It’s not an option. I’m all out of those.”
“But if it’s not what you wanted, why didn’t you say something?”
“The old man reads people. Probably figured that’s what I wanted. I mean, I never gave him a reason to think otherwise.”
“Well, his comprehension could use some work.”
Reed laughs and lies on the ground, hands under his head. “You tell him that, baby.”
“Maybe I will.” I roll onto my side, hand propping my head up as I study his face. He closes his eyes, and the only sound is the rushing water and the heartbeat in my ears.
“You want a Polaroid?”
I smile, and when I don’t respond, he opens his eyes and meets my gaze.
“We’ll think of something, Reed. I promise.”
He pulls a hand out from under his head and touches my cheek, thumb running along my jawline. All I want to do is melt into his touch. But I don’t. I hold my breath, counting the seconds until his hand falls from my face.
“It’s okay, Rubes. It’s my lot. I’ll have to deal with it and man up.”
With that, I sit up, knees up, and fold my arms around myself. He sounds like my father now. And I don’t like it. Not one bit. Something about being out here feels so far removed from that single-focused mindset my father has always had. Like out here they know there is more to life than working every waking hour. And I don’t want that for Reed.
I’m used to it. It’s all I know. But somehow for him, I figure that’s a life sentence, not an actual life.
“Hungry?” Reed breaks my train of thought.
“Yeah,” I say, but my voice is weak.
He stands and drops a hand to pull me up. I take it, and he tugs me to my feet. The sun has gone down, and the first stars have poked from the dark grey blanket to the east. The sky is stunning out here. The mountains around us create a border, showcasing everything Mother Nature has to give.
I shiver. The chill in the air is noticeable now.
“Cold?” Reed says, pulling me into a tight hug.