Page 54 of So I Know it's Real

“Because I still fuckedwithyou after Ifuckedyou,” I confessed without thinking. “Wait. I didn’t mean—”

“None of it!” She snarled in disgust. “I never thought you were the type of man who would do anythingfor money.”

“I’m not pressed about money! Had I won, I would’ve given you the bread.”

“Screw that! All I wanted was you!”

My head snapped back. “Wanted? So, everything we’ve done, all the time we’ve spent together, none of it matters, Lucky? We’re better than this.”

“No, we’re not. The man I met almost four months ago was brutally honest. He wouldn’t do something as desperate as bet on a woman.”

“I wasn’t betting on you. I was betting on me!”

Her lips quivered as she muttered, “Well, I hope the reward was worth breaking my heart.”

I pressed my fists into my forehead and groaned. “Stop making it seem like I used you. Did you forget you jumped on my dick? I didn’t force you to do shit.”

“Did you have any plans on telling me about the bet?” she asked, ignoring what I said.

As I shook my head, Clover’s bottom lip sagged. I hated to disappoint her, but I couldn’t lie to her. Not again.

“Destin, if you don’t see how foul it is to date me, knowing it’s motivated by money, you’re a damn fool.”

“Don’t get disrespectful, Clover.”

“Shut up and get out of my house!” She gave me her back. “I’ll be in contact with you about my next appointment.”

I wanted to fight her on it. I wanted to tell her how much I loved her. I also knew Clover deserved the space she asked for.

Once I dragged myself to my car, I checked my phone and saw I had missed three calls from my grandmother. Since I knew why she was calling, I thought to wait to call her back, but there was no sense in avoiding the conversation.

“What’s up, Mama Jo?” I tried to sound nonchalant.

“Destin Buttah Sharpe! Have you lost your fucking mind going up to the church with your ghetto shit?”

I freed a deep breath. “It wasn’t as bad as you think.”

“Don’t test me, boy! Where are you at right now?”

“Leaving Clover’s house. Shit is all bad, Mama Jo.”

I told her what went down and noticed the way my voice cracked as I spoke.

Mama Jo’s labored breaths turned into soft sighs. “Buttah, I think it’s time you give her some space.”

“I don’t want to.” I grimaced. “I’ve been under this woman every day for months. The only time we were apart was when she found out about Barbara. Where the hell am I supposed to go?”

“That’s something for you to figure out. Clover is pregnant. Stress isn’t good for her or baby.”

I scoffed. “Who knows? That’s probably not—Never mind. Let me stop.”

“Yeah, because you’re about to say some stupid shit.”

“Players fuck up too,” I commented. “I understand why Clover’s upset, but it’s not like I left her hanging. We slept together before we ever went on a date. If I was using her, I would’ve left her alone after that.”

“Durk, cut the shit. No matter how you shape it, you were deceitful. Be man enough to admit that without making excuses.”

My head collided with the headrest once she hung up on me. If the shoe was on the other foot, I would’ve questioned everything about Clover. I would’ve accused her of holding onto other secrets I didn’t know about. She wasn’t wrong for cutting me off. It just hurt like hell.

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