Page 16 of Hard to Judge

“Hailey and me…and you.”

Something feral and completely foreign sinks its claws into my heart. The need to possess rips me wide open, pouring desire into my veins. I thought I wanted it before, but I’ve never experienced this level of primal necessity.

The desire for a family of my own making pins me to the floor while simultaneously launching me among the stars. It tears me in two.

I want what he’s laying before me, and that scares me more than the locked bathroom door between us so long ago. Because it can’t happen. It would never work.

I pull the trigger.

“She could fall in love with me.”

Arlo nods. Like that wouldn’t be a fatal blow to his fragile heart. He studies me closely. “Could you fall in love with her?”

I blink at him, totally ambushed by the reaction. It’s not the one I expected. Not by a long shot.

Love does not come easily to me. This should be an easy answer.

It’s not.

Hailey loves Arlo, and he loves her.

I love Arlo.

It’s safe to say he attracts a certain type. A fractured yet strong person. It’s safe to say I’m attracted to the same type. It’s safe to say Hailey is also attracted to the same type.

Which makes all of this as far from safe as we can get.

Hailey has high walls. I’m very athletic. And if my devotion to Arlo is any show of it, I’m fucking determined too.

She’s not easy to get close to, but loving her would be frighteningly easy.

I finish my drink, set it on a piece of furniture so exquisite it should be in a museum, and head for the door.

“Hota?” The rasped word is a three-act play in itself.

A tragedy for sure.

“Yes.” I shove the door with much more force than necessary.

“Yes, to what?” he yells.

“All of it.” I bellow and then put as much distance between us as quickly as possible.

I wave Leonard, Arlo’s driver, off and open the door to the limo that just stopped in front of me.

“Now, who’s avoiding whom?” my friend rasps from inside.

“If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a hundred times.” I grin, and then let it fall off my face. “Fuck off.”

When he makes no move to shift his long legs out of the way, I shove them from my path with the toe of my casual boot. I climb inside the car, close the door behind me, and move to the long bench seat, putting space between us. I barely restrain myself from tossing my coat at his face. I lay it across the front bench seat.

My chest is tight and my palms itch, and the car hasn’t even started moving. Maybe I can bail. There’s still time to get to the door.

“Don’t even think about it.” Arlo shifts his legs back into the path to the door I just entered.

“Too late.” It’s not the only exit. I eye the door closest to me. It’s also close to the midmorning traffic zipping by. If I leap now, I might kill two birds with one stone. Literally.

I would never do that to him.