Page 27 of Hard to Judge

“It was terrifying and exhilarating. His touch was like coming home to a place that hasn’t been mine for long but was the most perfect place for a moment.”

“That’s it.” She works me with her hand. “Come for me.” Her lips envelop me. She pulls me deep and slides me down her throat.

My balls go heavy and hot. My spine tingles.

“Siren, fuck. Just like that.” It only takes three shameless thrusts, and I give her what she demands. My vision goes dark for several beats, and my mind is blissfully quiet.

Hailey cleans me with her perfect mouth and tucks me away.

“I’m not done with you,” I warn.

“No, mister.” She climbs into my lap, bracketing her thighs with my hips and bracing my face in her hands. “I’m not done with you.”

“Who’s bossy now?”

“Me.” She smiles. “What if you could have more nights like tonight? What if they could be even better than tonight?”

I long to pull her into my chest and tell her that nothing could top tonight. We both know that’s not exactly true, though, which is the terrifying part.

“Hailey.” I sigh.

“Answer my question,” she prods, pulling my face closer to hers.

“It would be more than I deserve when I already have more than I deserve,” I promise. It’s not a lie. Not in the least. “You opened up my world, Hailey. You are enough for me. More than enough.”

Her lips press to the tip of my nose. “I know I’m enough. I’m waiting for you to realize you’re enough too. Enough for Hota to love.”

A heavy groan leaves me, and with it, a bit of the fear. Hailey is mine, and I am hers. We’ll be okay no matter what. “I loved tonight. If we could have more nights like it, I’d cherish every moment. If they could be more, it would be fucking amazing.” I kiss her nose. “How does hearing all that make you feel?”

“Wonderful.” She beams.

“How? Why?” I bracket her face as she brackets mine, looking deep for the answers. “If you were to say another person was home for you…I don’t know how that would make me feel.”

“Yes, you do.” She nods just a little. “If I felt that way about Hota…”

She leaves it unsaid, but I know exactly what she’s saying. If she felt that way about Hota, it would be only fitting. It would flow with the laws of the universe. The way I see them, anyway.

“You two have a love that’s outlasted immense trauma, life changes, and years.” She pulls my hands from her face and holds them close to her heart. “Would I feel this way if it was anyone else? Probably not. It’s not some mild infatuation. It’s not some fleeting attraction. With Hota, it’s real love.” Her chin is up, and her smile wide. “I adore seeing you happy, Arlo. He makes you happy.”

My mouth moves to add that she makes me happy too, but she plows ahead.

“For some inexplicable reason, I love seeing Hota happy too.” Her slight shoulder bobs. Just one. And she grins. “Seeing you two love each other doesn’t diminish our love. It only multiplies it for me.”

She draws a deep breath and grabs my nape, threading her fingers through my hair. “When you brought me to Crave to show me how much and how unconditionally you loved me, you not only broke down the last of my walls but you also made me see the world in a whole new light. Forever, I was scared of love, of feeling, of opening myself up to hurt.”

Her head shakes. The tips of her lips rise.

“Loving you is the best feeling. You adore me completely. All my pretty parts and my ugly ones too. How can I not do the same for you?”

“You don’t have to do anything for me,” I swear.

Her cheek brushes against mine on one side, then the other before she rests her forehead against mine. “I know. Which makes me want to do it more.”

My mouth, which was so adamant about moving and making sounds a moment ago, hangs open uselessly.

She laughs. “Say something.”

Quickly, I tabulate the conversation. I love that she’s so open and willing to make me happy, but what about her? “I don’t want you to do this, whatever this is, just for me. Do you love Hota?”

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