Page 116 of Liars and Liaisons

My brows arch into my hairline, and I bite back a laugh. “Well, that’s going to make the rest of our lives really awkward.”

He turns his head as I push to my feet, ripping my T-shirt over my head and then shimmying out of my pajama shorts, standing before him in just a pair of flimsy lace panties. I’m aware that Cora or my mother could witness my bare breasts at any moment if they happened to look outside, but I don’t really care.

What I care about is reigniting the heat in Grayson’s emerald gaze. He watches me with forced restraint pulsing in his eyes, and my skin sets aflame when I see him clutch at the concrete, like he’s trying to keep from reaching out and taking me.

I take a step forward, grabbing his arm. Bringing it up, I flatten one palm over my breast, squeezing the heavy flesh, forcing my warmth into his icy fingers.

“Does that feel like I don’t want you to touch me?” I do the same with his other hand, and my pulse speeds up, clamoring between my thighs.

“You shouldn’t—”

“Don’t even start with theyou deserve better than mebullshit, Grayson James. I didn’t ask, and I don’t care. If you wanted to get rid of me,” I say, crouching to straddle his hips, “you shouldn’t have come into that house to save me. I am afraid good deeds like that deserve rewards.”

He moves his hands from my breasts, sliding them around to my back and then down to settle on my ass. An almost grin lights up his face. “I don’t do good deeds.”

“Well, lucky for you,Ido. And loving you, Grayson James, might be the best deed of all.”

My heart pounds behind my ribs, alight with so much affection and acceptance for this man who terrorized me when we first met. I absolutely shouldn’t be with someone like him, shouldn’t even be considering any of this, given the horrors of what transpired tonight that I’m sure we’ve only reached the surface of.

“You love me?” he asks.

I nod. “Unfortunately. I love you very much.”

He laughs, the sound free and clear as it drifts up into the night sky. Then, he leans up, capturing my lips in a kiss that feels like it alters space and time with its severity, and I realize the wrongness of our situation doesn’t matter.

Forgiveness is for me. Being with him, choosing to no longer deny that parts of my soul enjoy the darkness, is the kindest gift I can grant the both of us.

After all, daylight can’t exist without the night that comes before it.

EPILOGUE

A sea of young, enthusiastic, unspoiled faces stare at me from varying spots around the auditorium. The lights in the audience are kept low to keep distractions from a minimum as I begin my lecture.

Up the stairs at the top of the room, the four doors leading inside are locked. That’s my policy; five minutes after our course is scheduled to begin, and my TA bars access until class is dismissed. Punctuality is important, especially when it comes to learning music theory.

I say as much to the students, and as always, there’s one in the front who raises their hand. “Ms. Singh,” I reply, leaning a hip on the edge of the shiny Baldwin on stage with me. “I beg of you to hold your questions until after I’m finished.”

She lowers her arm, smoothing a hand over her short, spiked black hair, acting as if that was her intent in the first place.

Turning back to the curtains behind me, I gesture toward the projection highlighted on the red velvet material. “Your textbooks and curriculum will try to over-complicate certain concepts when it comes to music. Like harmony, for instance. Understanding harmony is thekeyto creating a palatable score, or adding lyrics, or even just playing for yourself in your dorm while you try to ignore your roommate and the fourth girl they’ve brought home this week.”

Chuckles echo through the room, and I give the class a small grin in return.

I’d forgotten how much I loved teaching.

The reason I entered the field in the first place, while in part to separate myself from my family, was because I wanted to help others recognize their full potential, and cultivate talent.

I hadn’t planted the seedlings, but I was certainly going to help them grow.

Granted, my return was a bit delayed on account of everything that happened after my father and brother’s deaths. In the interim, I assisted Sonny in overturning Ezekiel’s assets, dissolving any lingering partnerships or contracts he had with varying artists and labels between LA and New York, and generally latching onto any spark of creativity I could find once the James estate was condemned.

It didn’t burn to the ground like my father and Nate wanted it to. At least, not right away.

I had to go back a few times to make sure all fourteen-thousand square feet was nothing but a pile of ash. Not to mention, keeping the fire contained was an effort in itself. One I had to recruit Duris’s city fire fighters in.

After everything, I wasn’t sure it’d be enough. The damage that the pair had done to not only my psyche but to those around me—I thought it was too much. Too daunting to ever recover from.

I was underestimating the power of a muse. A gift bestowed upon me by the cosmos themselves, as if my musical ability is some vital part of the universe that cannot be replicated or lived without.

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