Page 131 of Best Friends for Never

“Why not? Don’t you want to be with him? You’ve loved him since you were a kid.”

Of courseI want to be with Noel. More than anything. But it’s not that simple.

How could we even make this work? Would Noel live here? Would I live in LA? Would I have to give up my business with Axel? And what about all the chaos that comes with being a star? Would I evenwantto deal with that?CouldI?

I don’t know.

“What’s the point? We both want different things. Noel wants to live in LA, and I want to stay here. Nothing’s changed over the last ten years.”

“I don’t think that’s true.”

But itistrue. He still wants a life I’m not sure I want to live. Or evencouldlive. It’s the same thing he wanted when he was eighteen and the same way I felt whenIwas eighteen.

We might be older, but we’re at the same spot we were when he was leaving last time.

“Can we talk about something else?” I ask.

She opens her mouth like she wants to argue but thinks better of it, instead nodding.

“Okay,” she says.

Relief floods me.Thank gosh, she’s dropping it.

“But can I just say one more thing?”

I groan. “Like you weren’t going to anyway.”

“For what it’s worth,” she continues like I never spoke, “Noel is worth the work. I think this thing you two have is worth it too. Seeing you this last month with him here ...” She shakes her head with a soft smile. “I haven’t seen you like that in a long, long time. You’re happy with him.Hemakes you happy. He always has, even when he’s annoying you. That kind of love ... It doesn’t come around often, trust me. So whatever is holding you back, I’m here to tell you that you’re strong enough to work through it. Especially if it means having a shot at the kind of love you and Noel have.”

She pushes off the counter, then moves to the oven and pulls it open.

“Grab some plates, will you?” she asks like she didn’t just drop that bomb on me.

Noeldoesmake me happy. He always has. Some of the best memories of my life include him, and I don’t think that’s a coincidence. I know it’s because of him and the impact he’s always had on me. From the day I met him, something about him drew me in. I don’t know if it was his smile or how he complimented my backpack or what, but I liked him instantly. He made me feel welcome. He made me feel safe. He made me feelloved.

Twenty years later, he still makes me feel all those things.

I push from the stool and do as she asks. We plate our dinners and then take them outside, where Noel and Clifford have a fire roaring.

We make light conversation as we eat our dinner, and I participate, but my mind is halfway on the ticking clock hanging over our heads.

And when Noel pushes up from his chair, I know it’s time.

“Astrid,” he says, crossing the lawn to my mother as she rises to meet him. He wraps her into his arms, hugging her tightly, and I love how they cling to one another. They’ve always had a bond, and I’mforever grateful for the way my mother took him in as her own over the years.

I turn away from them, giving them a moment alone.

I jump when a hand lands on the small of my back.

“Sorry,” Noel says. “You ready?”

I give him a small smile. “I’m ready.”

I hug my mother goodbye and promise to check in with her tomorrow, then I wave to Clifford before Noel navigates us back through the house and out the front door.

We’re quiet as we hit Borgen Avenue. It takes me a minute to realize we’re not headed toward my house, but I know instantly where Noel is leading us without him saying a word.

Five minutes later, we walk down the lane to the Noel Carter Theater, then push inside.

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