Page 17 of Clash of Sin and Secret

“It was just a nightmare.” My voice quakes with anger more than fear now, heat rising to meet Zane’s worried gaze. “Of the time after you threw me away.”

Zane recoils. “Scottie, please. Don’t?—”

I run a shaky hand over my forehead and exhale. “Sorry, that wasn’t fair. I told you bad things happened in New York. I was out of my depths, hurt, and alone. There are moments when those memories get the better of me.”

Tucker squeezes my shoulder, sending a rush of magical energy to ease me. I relax into his touch and let him ground me further against the demons of my past. I refuse to let them swallow me whole again. “You’re safe now, beautiful. We’ve got you.”

Zane glances at Tucker before focusing on me again. “How can I fix this?”

“You can’t.” My answer slips out before I can stop myself. “In my head, I know it’s not your fault, but in my heart, I know that if I was here with you and Da, it never would’ve happened.”

It’s a sharp barb aimed right at his heart, but it’s my truth and he needs to hear it. He flinches but recovers quickly, his expression filled with regret. “I don’t know what you went through, and I won’t ask your forgiveness, but if there’s ever anything that I can do to help, just ask. I could use my gift to take the memories away from you.”

“Your father has tried a dozen times. It doesn’t help.”

Zane frowns. “My father knew what happened, and he didn’t tell me?”

“It wasn’t aboutyou, Zane. It happened to me!” The words tear out like shrapnel embedded deep within—all jagged edges ripping open old wounds that never fully healed. “And yes, Francesco knew what happened because he and Da were the ones who realized I was missing and came after me. They rescued me and made sure I was taken care of while I recovered.”

The devastation on Zane’s face gets worse with everything I say. Gripping his hand, I give it a squeeze. “It was a long time ago. Give me a minute to stick it all back in its box. The energyjolt must’ve kicked it loose. Some space until I lock it down again.”

Zane looks like he might argue and press the point, but then he leans closer and presses his forehead against mine. It’s a gesture that is both intimate yet painfully distant. Flipping back the covers, he slides out of bed and casts a backward glance that breaks my heart. “Take care of her, Tuck. She’s precious and not as tough as she thinks she is.”

Tucker nods. “I’ve got our girl. Don’t worry.”

Part of me thinks I should be angry that these two alpha males are discussing my care as if I belong to them. Another part of me is thankful they’re willing to share the responsibility of my happiness.

Because as messy as it is…I love them both.

“I’ll be in my suite if you need anything—day or night.”

“Thanks, Zane.”

Then, just like that…Zane is out the door and down the hallway.

Tucker lays back down on the mattress and holds his arms open. I sink into the warmth of his embrace and close my eyes as he pulls the duvet up to cover us. With his index finger, he draws gentle circles over the detailed lines of the Vasari Sacred Squire mark inked into my forearm. “I’m sorry you suffered through whatever it was. Tell me if there’s anything I can do to help you.”

“You’re doing it. This helps.” Heat starts creeping back into me again, erasing the icy dread that took me over. It helps me to relax and with the magic tingling between us, erases the dark memories quicker than ever before. “It’s not even like I remember any of it clearly. The nightmares are always the same, just a bunch of horrible, angry images and feelings. The man who took me kept me drugged most of the time.”

Tucker tenses around me but says nothing, his finger faltering for a moment before continuing his caress.

“Do you know who that was?”

“His name was Russ Fusco. I don’t know much more than that. He ran some kind of sex trafficking ring, only he took a personal interest in me.”

I hug her a little tighter. “Not your fault. None of what happened is on you.”

“I’m ashamed more than anything.”

“Oh, Scotland. Don’t be. Whatever happened, no matter how or why, shame just gives it power. We judge ourselves by our worst moments, instead of our best. Don’t carry around your darkest moment—celebrate your brightest.”

He’s right.

“But what about the others? There were other girls there when Da and Francesco came to save me. What if me being gone made things worse for them?”

“I don’t know what happened, but I knew your father and Francesco. There is no way they would allow the man who kidnapped you to continue to hurt people. I’d bet that once they got you to safety, they shut him down hard.”

Yeah, that’s probably true.

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