Ever glances at me over her shoulder again, and this close, I can make out every feature on that half of her face, as well as how broken they all are. What the hell happened to this girl? Tomygirl? Black streaks of mascara cover her cheek all the way to her jawline where inky drops quiver, ready to fall.
“But it’s not. I have never, ever wanted to hate someone more and I have never, ever loved anyone more.”
“Pathetic.”
“Unquestionably,” I once again agree, this time with an embarrassing voice crack because I’ve never felt fear like this. If she doesn’t back up from that goddamn edge…
“I broke your heart. I saw it,” she says.
“Yeah.”
“And you’re still here.”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
“You’re my first thought every morning, the last thought every night, and you’re sure as hell every thought in between. I assumed that’d stop as soon as the paychecks did, but it hasn’t. Not at all. You’re still here.” I point to my head. “And here.” My hand falls to my heart and I thump my chest with it in time with my erratic heartbeat.
She shakes her head, as if to clear it.
“You need to go. You’re not even supposed to be here.”
“I’m not,” I admit. I signed a contract saying I wouldn’t step foot within a hundred yards of the Munreaux property. Arthur can sue me for every penny I have. I’ll gladly hand over all five million five hundred thousand of them if it means I can save his daughter.
“But I can’t leave without you,” I also admit. I did that once, one fucking time, and look what happened. The love of my life’s about to jump off a motherfucking cliff.
“You don’t understand. I can’t. Ican’t.”
I throw my arms out wide. “Make me! Make me understand! I’m right here, goddamn it. Just tell me! I’m fucking begging you to!”
With a finger blindly jabbed behind her at the manor, she says, “He wants me to be something I’m not. Something I’d rather die than be!” Her head is shaking uncontrollably now, her body still too close to the edge.
She’s going over. I can see it. I canfeelit. She truly believes this is her only way out.
Gripping my head, I unleash a guttural growl. “Fine! Fuck! You spoiled, brat-ass, always-get-your-way, can’t-ever-fucking-listen, biggest pain in my ass…” I rip my hands away, grateful I don’t have long hair or it’d be coming with. “Fine! Okay? You win. Let’s do it.”
“Do what?”
“You wanna jump, Ever? I’ll be right fucking behind you.”
“Don’t be stupid, Crue. You won’t survive.”
“If you go over that cliff…” I point at it, my hand trembling. “I won’t need to. You aremyflyer,mybutterfly,mybat, myeverything! And I’ll be god-fucking-damned if I’m gonna spend a second on this planet without you!”
The fear doesn’t stand a chance against the anger fighting for dominance. I’m fucking livid. I finally find the girl of my dreamsand she wants to die. Die! Without me. Who the fuck does she think she is doinganythingwithout me? From the highest peaks in the sky, to the deepest pits in the sea, where she goes, I go. I’m her man, her protector, her everything, even in death.
Fuck Arthur Munreaux and fuck his bullshit contract.
I’ve lied on a legal document before and I’m still standing.
Not for long.
I shake out one foot, then do the same thing with the other one.
Jesus Christ, this is gonna hurt so fucking bad. Hopefully it’s over quickly.
Ever’s gaze on the ground below me, she asks, “You’re wearing the shoes?”