Page 8 of My Thursday Throwback

Dear Diary,

Tomorrow I will be13.

Daddy says I am growing into a woman. He even said I was getting a woman’s body.

The front of his pants started to stick out as he looked at me.

Mike told me never to be alone in the house with Daddy. He said something bad could happen to me. I believe him.

I think Daddy is an evil, horrible man who gives me nightmares. Three times he has come into the bathroom on me when I am about to take a shower. I know I locked the door, but he still came in any way. When I told him I would tell Mr. Bautista, he stopped doing it.

I wished Mr. Bautista was my daddy instead of him. The things he does and says are not what a father is supposed to say to his little girl. The things he does are definitely on the list of things a man doesn’t want his daughter to see, like having sex with Mom. (Ewww!!!!) Daddy likes to do it with Mom so I can see him. One day I came home early from school and caught them on the couch. He held his finger up to his lips, telling me to be quiet while Momma bounced up and down in his lap, making loud noises sounding like she was in horrible pain. She cried afterward. I didn’t understand what I was looking at.

Later in the kitchen, Daddy told me he likes to punish Momma for being a bad girl. She makes those noises when she has been really bad he told me. He promised me that after my birthday, he was going to start teaching me how to be a good girl. When I did bad things, he would punish me like he did Momma.

I don’t want to be punished.

I’m scared of him.

I think he knows it.

He likes that I am scared of him.

I am going to run away.

Zelda Marie Fitzsimmons, Age 12

---