Page 27 of Son of a Witch

Astra wasn’t all innocent in this. She’d hidden secrets from us that broke our trust, and we worked our way back to regain it.

None of us were perfect. That was what made us beautiful, tragic, and broken.

Knoxe pinched the tension at the bridge of his nose. “Telling him will destroy the morale when it’s already at an all-time low. Got it?”

If Tor couldn’t keep it together, we’d do it for him. As a team.

“Yes, Knoxe,” I gave him my agreement.

“I’ll go speak to Tor and see if he’s okay.” Knoxe collected his plate and tray and left Astra and me. He did that a lot lately. Whether his mentoring made a difference remained to be seen.

The melody within Astra lightened with relief at his departure. Something had happened between those two. The music never lied.

“You have another argument with Knoxe?” I forced myself to eat the rest of my meal. Needed to maintain my strength.

Her back stiffened and she leaned forward. “It’s nothing. My dad said something that got under my skin.” She took a swipe of her Coke and set her can down. “I think he’s being a dick and trying to upset the team dynamic.”

I rubbed her back the way she did with me to lower my anxiety levels. The usual burn in my palm was a mild flame that I liked. “He’s been locked up for a long time. He probably doesn’t know how to play well with others.”

“Yeah. You’re probably right.” She leaned back in her chair, tapping her nails on the Coke can.

I dipped my hand beneath the table to hold her thigh the way she liked.

Astra swiveled in her seat to face me. She played with my hair and sparked heat to course through my chest. It felt like an age since she’d touched me. All her attention lately had been gifted to Tor and I’d languished in the cold shadows.

“You holding up okay?” Her question reopened my wound.

Not really. I was getting on Tor’s nerves by the aggressive tone of his body and voice. Doing more harm than good. Seemed like I couldn’t do anything right. Tor blamed me for his accident, resented me, and would never forgive me. Riddled with guilt, I wasn’t sleeping, barely able to think straight, and had forced myself to eat.

“Fine.” The dark notes of my lie bit into me.

“This isn’t your fault, Pascal.” She trailed her fingers on the shell of my ear. “Don’t beat yourself up about it.”

How could she say that? I withdrew from her. “It is my fault. Tor can’t walk because I faltered and failed to save him from Styx.”

She took my hand and threaded her fingers through mine. “Blaming yourself isn’t going to change what happened.”

The logical side of me knew she was right, but that didn’t silence the screaming voices in my head accompanying the grave music accusing me of harming my buddy. Guilt tightened around my throat, and I tugged at the collar of my white t-shirt beneath my orange prison uniform.

She stroked my lap with her free hand. “Nothing goes smoothly for superheroes either. They all face tragedy. Dead family or friends. Losing a battle with an enemy. Fading powers and struggling to be the hero.” Her fingers squeezed mine and for the first time in three days, the somber notes went silent.

Superheroes, comics, music, and my girlfriend were the only things I understood, and I appreciated her reference. People and their behavior didn’t make sense to me, unless I could read them through the filter of my musical magick.

My girlfriend slid into my lap and I twitched, sparking with intense heat at the contact. But I allowed her to stay there, getting used to the feel of her body on mine. The weight of her on my legs. Her warmth soaking into my body. The release of my neck muscles that had been bunched tightly.

Astra’s fingers played with the back of my neck and the hair there. “Without adversity, they don’t grow as characters and heroes.” My arms locked around her waist, pulling her closer, tucking her head to my chest. “Remember how Titanius ignored the warning from Red Swan and her ship was blown up?”

I twitched, trying to remember from my comics but struggled to. The old memory didn’t work as well since the accident.

“No.” My hands drifted up the curve of her lower back, drawing a symphony on her spine.

The back of her nails stroked my neck and I fell into the pleasure of it. “Titanius thought she wouldn’t be able to save the Wullo from the Crax without her ship. But she found another way. Heroes always do.”

True. That was why I loved comics. Good guys overcoming challenges and defeating bad guys. Autism came with a lot of challenges, from learning difficulties to not being able to relate to my family, sensitivities to audio and touch, even bullies picking on me. Heroes in the comics inspired me to face my problems head-on and finding coping mechanisms to handle them. Without Astra and my superheroes, it would have been a tougher road all alone.

Astra gently tugged my face down to place a soft kiss on my forehead. “Every superhero goes through their darkest days before they find the strength to keep going and defeat their enemies.”

Easy for her to say. In my case, I was the enemy. Tor hated me for what I did, and nothing I did would make up for it.