Page 49 of Switch Pitching

I get why people steal their hookups’ clothes now, but I never thought that I’d be the one to do it. Before I give myself evenmore things to overthink, I decide to join Ethan in the kitchen. He’s got his back turned away from me as he hums to himself, watching the frying pan. I take a seat on a barstool, and I find myself checking him out. Again. Broad shoulders, v-taper, and that incredible ass. My eyes always go to the same places, but I’m not getting bored.

Maybe Ethan’s so hot that everyone’s attracted to him, even if they’re not into men.

Nope. That doesn’t make any sense at all.

Ethan turns around and smirks, so I raise an eyebrow in confusion.

“It was bound to happen one of these days, it’s a rite of passage for any athlete.”

“What does that mean?”

Ethan laughs. “We had sex and you’re wearing my college baseball hoodie. With my name and number on the back.”

I dash to the hallway mirror and groan. Out of all the sweaters I could’ve picked, I grabbed the one that screams “trophy”.

“I know where you live, so don’t steal it.” Ethan’s voice carries from the kitchen, and I slink back to find him huddled over the stove, frantically flipping the eggs that are starting to burn.

Half-laughing and half-having a crisis, I put my elbows down on the counter and bury my forehead in my hands. Ethan dumps the eggs onto two plates and pours some coffee for both of us.

“How do you know if you’re gay?” I ask.

Ethan chokes as he cuts his sip of coffee short. “Say again?”

“Like, how do I know if I’m into men?”

Recovering, Ethan shuffles in his seat and thinks. “Physically or emotionally?” he asks.

“Either? I don’t know. I’m kinda new to this.”

“Okay, let’s start with the basics. How did you first realize that you’re attracted to women?”

I’m not sure how to answer. “Well, I got crushes when I was younger, like, I wanted to be friends with a girl, but it felt… more. What was it like for you?”

Ethan pauses.

“So,” he starts. “Crushes were definitely a thing, and I had a hard time telling the difference between wanting to be friends with someone and liking them more than that. I can tell the difference now because I know what to look for, but it was confusing for me back then.”

Huh. That kinda hits close to home. I’ve had intense friendships before, but they never felt romantic. I think. Maybe I didn’t realize or let myself go there.

I fumble for the right words. “I’m attracted to you, but I don’t know if it’s you or if I’m actually into men.”

Ethan leans back. “Do you find other guys attractive?”

Sure, I can tell when a guy is hot, but has that ever spilled over into actual attraction?

“I don’t know,” I say.

“You don’t have to figure it out right away. This stuff takes time.”

That makes sense, but I want to figure this outnow. My curiosity can’t be killed that easily. Maybe it’s contextual, but how can I tell if I react physically to guysin general?

Then it clicks.

“I have to run an experiment.”

Ethan tilts his head, prompting me to elaborate.

“I need to watch dude porn.”

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