Page 31 of Justified Lies

The always put together woman was wearing mismatched sweats, her long blonde locks tied back thoughtlessly. There wasn’t a drop of makeup on her usually done up face, but her cheeks still glowed from anger, embarrassment, or some combination of the two. Lianna’s heart sunk—she knew the feeling well. Emotional and physical fatigue were equally crippling.

Nicki was apologetic. “I am so sorry for asking you to come here.We,” stealing a glance at her husband who had just announced his presence by banging into the pantry door, “are very grateful.”

Until that moment, Darren hadn’t noticed Lianna. Chancing a glance in his direction, Lianna rose from the chaise lounge she had been sitting on in the family room. As he zeroed in on her, his red-rimmed eyes seemed to double in size. The look on his face was downright frightening.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

“Darren, for Christ’s sake!” Nicki spun on him. “It’s not her fault I had to come get you!”

He took several stumbling steps from their farmhouse inspired kitchen, towards the center hallway where Lianna had found her way. Even intoxicated, Darren managed to look polished, if you didn’t make eye contact. While his body movements were sloppy, his speech was poignant.

“I have no clue why my brother chose you.” Darren stepped uncomfortably close to Lianna. “You know, you were the reason he was drinking that night, don’t you? Because you told him you were leaving. What a selfish bitch.”

Lianna and Nicki both sucked in a sharp breath at the verbal slap. Darren’s eyes were positively wild and for the firsttime Lianna felt more than just uneasy at his presence, she felt afraid.

“Oh, Lianna, that’s not true. He doesn’t mean this.” Nicki stood between them, head on a swivel, alternating looks of shock and disbelief.

“Yes, I do,” Darren leaned slightly forward, his labored breath thick and sweet with the scent of whisky.

Lianna felt like a knife was plunged simultaneously in her heart and stomach. She didn’t know if she was going to puke, cry, or run. Months of therapy was responsible for what flowed out of her mouth next. Taking a steadying breath, she held her chin up and met his gaze. She didn’t need to take this shit from him.

“No, Darren, Scott drank that night because he was an alcoholic. He died because he chose to drink and drive. And I was leaving him because he chose … alcohol, among other things, over his family.”

It read like a line straight from an Al-Anon meeting. She might still feel guilt, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t regurgitate the material that had been shoved down her throat.

Nicki, who must be dizzy at this point, continued to look back and forth, her mouth hanging open.

Then, knowing she was crossing the line, but too angry to care, Lianna finished, “I’d hate for you to make the same mistakes.”

“Get the fuck out of my house,” Darren spat the words, glaring at her like she was the vilest organism on earth. “You should have left here two years ago when Scott died.”

It was as if he knew exactly what to say to break her heart. Feeling the tears burning in the back of her eyes, Lianna turned on her heels, refusing to give him the satisfaction of seeing her cry.

She made it to the front door before Nicki caught up to her. There were also tears in her sister-in-law’s tired eyes.

“I’m so sorry, I don’t even know what to say.”

“Please don’t apologize for him. I’m also sorry, for you.” Lianna placed a shaky hand on Nicki’s arm in a gesture she hoped relayed understanding.

A tear slipped down Nicki’s cheek. Trying to hide her emotions, she bent down and retrieved Lianna’s purse from where she dropped it at the front door upon arrival. When she righted herself, she was slightly more composed.

“I never knew you and Scott were having problems. That you were separating.”

Lianna regretted that, regretted she didn’t let anyone in on their real life instead of the fake picture of perfection they portrayed.

“Not many people did. I think just Darren, maybe his parents.” She shrugged.

It felt almost like relief to get it off her chest. Her own parents still never knew she gave up her home and career for a relationship she could not fix. Maybe if she had confided in more people before, she wouldn’t have felt so much shame and loneliness.

“You are the best sister-in-law for putting up with him, and for coming to sit with his kids on your own night off.” Nicki sniffled.

“And I’ll do it any time you need me to. I love the kids, and I love you. I’m here if you need me, Nicki, please know that.”

The woman nodded, unable to form the words. Lianna gave her a quick squeeze then let herself out before the barraging started again.

It was one of those late October evenings that personified eerie. The air was thick with moisture and the low-lying fog cast an ominous warning.Perfect setting for the night’s events.Hustling to her car, Lianna didn’t breathe until the doors were locked and the motor was running.

Once she was alone, every word that had just been exchanged started to replay in her head. The words taunted her, as anxiety made her chest ache.How could Darren be so naïve to his brother’s true nature? Lianna was glad for the anger. It was always easier than sadness.

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