Page 59 of Justified Lies

“He’s great. He’s a really great kid.”

There was silence and when he looked up to see longing in her eyes he went on.

“Jacob loves school, he’s smart. The kid’s got a ton of friends. He’s almost as good at sports as me, but he looks just like you.”

Megan sniffed, tears filling her blue eyes.

“I’m not surprised,” she was able to get out before some of those tears began to spill over.

Rick stood and walked over to Megan. Scooting her over, he sat down and rubbed her back to console her. Gabe looked in his mother’s direction. Beth not comforting her daughter was hardly surprising, but there were tears in her eyes as well. Thefact that she showed any emotional connection to them certainly was.

This was all too much for Gabe, too weird.

“Listen, Megan, I really need you to tell me what’s going on here. Jacob and I have a good thing going and if you think I’m just going to give in and move back because you’re doing better…”

Megan choked on her words. “I don’t want you to move back. God, Gabe I don’t want to take Jacob away from you. I’ve never been fit to be his mom. I never will be.”

She stopped, took a ragged breath.

“It’s still a struggle to get myself through the day, let alone a kid.”

Gabe was momentarily blinded by relief. It washed through him and although he didn’t know what this was all about, he knew she didn’t want to take Jacob completely away. But would she want Gabe to come home, did she want to see the kid?

Megan stood on shaky legs and pulled a folded piece of paper out of her pocket.

“I, ah… I’ve obviously had a lot of time to think. This new therapist really opened my eyes to some stuff. She helped me realize that the only way to truly be set free is to release myself from the past. So, I want to read this to you guys. I don’t know how well I’ll do at getting this all out.”

She paused to swipe at more tears. “But, please, if you could let me finish first and then I promise everyone will have a chance to say anything they would like to me.”

Megan met each of their eyes. Gabe nodded.

“Okay,” Beth whispered.

“Go on, honey,” said Rick.

Megan read directly from the pages in her shaking hands. She hit on parts of their past the family had never dared to talkabout. About the substance abuse that plagued both her and Beth. About the incident that landed her in prison to begin with.

She didn’t pause until she said, “I don’t blame you, Mom, so you should stop blaming yourself.”

Beth covered her face with both hands, as sobs racked her body. Gabe fought hard to contain the lump in his throat at the sound of his mom’s distress. Both women needed several moments to compose themselves.

For the second time that day, the memories came vividly rushing back to Gabe. His family had never been normal, but when his dad got a promotion that required him to be out of town for two weeks a month, everything went to shit.

Gabe was in his senior year of high school and inebriated was Beth’s typical status. Megan was fourteen when she started coming home from school high on something almost every afternoon. Sometimes she walked home, sometimes a random guy drove her, sometimes it was the police that escorted her. Those days had been rough, but Gabe hadn’t realized how much worse it could get.

Then, one night collectively ruined them. Rick had been away on one of his work shifts, and Beth was consumed in a fling she had going with Gabe’s friend’s dad. No one knew about it, although Gabe did have his suspicions. His friend’s father—Allen, also married—came around more and more, while his buddy returned his calls less and less.

Gabe could still remember everything about that night, down to the detail. He lay on his twin bed, feet hanging over the edge, hands folded behind his head to help mask the lumps in his pillow. No sounds came from his parents’ room where his mom and herfriendhad been for several long minutes. It was a welcome reprieve.

The front door opened and slammed shut. Looking at his bedside clock, he saw it was a few minutes before midnight.Gabe let out a sigh, always relieved when his sister came home without drama. Closing his eyes against the darkness, his thoughts drifted. He couldn’t remember how long he had been asleep when he heard her yells.

Gabe jumped out of bed and threw open his bedroom door. Standing there in only his boxers, his heart raced as he listened hard. The hallway was empty, the house quiet. Deciding he had dreamed the scream, he turned back towards his room.

“Get off of me… Please!”

Megan’s voice was muffled as she begged. Gabe heard the slap just as he barged through the door across the hall. There, Allen, a man he had looked up to, loomed over his sister with his pants around his ankles. Megan’s wrists were secured above her head. She hadn’t even noticed Gabe yet.

“Get out!”