Page 15 of Between Now and Forever

“I don’t know… who’ll take care of you?”

“I’ll come visit. And I’ve got a wife, remember,” He says sternly.

I swallow my comment about his wife’s frequent absences and try to deflect again.

“James, it’s fine. I’m saving—”

“You’re a fucking receptionist, Liz. It’ll take you years. And, each year you stay here, it’ll get harder to leave. Let me do this for you. Focus on your applications, and when you get in, it’s on me,” he says, and I leap into his arms and hug him tight.

“Thank you for wanting to do that for me. For believing in me that much.” I sniffle when we pull apart. His expression softens when he sees the tears pool in my eyes.

“Look at that…rainbows.” He smiles and wipes a tear off my cheek.

I cry so infrequently that he always says my tears are as rare as rainbows.

He smiles. “I want different things for you. Finish school, fall in love, paint your way through Europe. Let your heart decide. Duke Tremaine is hardly the thing of fairy tales.”

“I don’t believe in fairy tales. I want things that I can hold on to. Look at Mom.That’swhat happens when you let your heart decide.”

“At least she’s happy,” he says stiffly.

The subject of our mother is a very sore point of contention between us. Unbidden and unwelcome, a quiver of pain runs through me at the thought of my mother.

“Dammit. Not today,” I mutter to myself and try to push it away so we can finish the conversation about school.

“I know I shouldn’t worry about leaving here. It’s just…y’all are all I have. Mom and Phil are gone. We may never see them again. You and Daddy are all I have. And yeah, I want him to love me.”

James’s expression turns pained.

“Liz…”

“I know with failing out of school and my learning problems and looking like her…I get scared sometimes that I’ll never do anything to please him. That he’ll always see me the way he saw Mom and the way he sees Fiona. As a nuisance. He likes Duke. If Duke liked me—”

“Duke won’t everlikeyou.” He says harshly.

I can’t hide my hurt at his frank assessment and my eyes sting with tears I won’t allow to fall. I let out a deep breath and collect myself before I speak again. But I can’t bring myself to meet his eye.

“Okay--. I mean I know I’m not--”

“Fuck, Liz, it’s not aboutyou,” he shakes his head.

“If Duke knew about the money you’re going to inherit, he’d be engaged to you already.”

I have a rush of excitement at the thought of being Duke’s fiancée. My father would die of happiness. And oh, how great it would be to walk into church with his ring on my finger. Maybe if I told him…

James’s groan snaps me out of my little scheming session.

“What?”

“I can see your mind turning. He would make you miserable. Be careful with him today. If he knew…he’d be dangerous to you.”

I roll my eyes and blow a dismissive breath. “He’s not kidnapping me and dragging me to Vegas at gunpoint.”

“Shit, if I thoughtthat,I wouldn’t be letting you go.”

It takes a few seconds for his words to sink in. When they do, I squeal and jump up and hug his neck.

“Thank you so much,” I croon.

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